tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10968366521017304122024-03-13T11:50:13.656-05:00HANDS&FEETAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.comBlogger29125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-989916906299226862016-05-15T16:54:00.001-05:002016-05-15T17:04:10.940-05:00The Heart of the GiverSome things I've been learning lately:<br />
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<b>A good, good Father gives the best gifts.</b><br />
He does not give cheap gifts, even the things that seem small carry great value. His gifts are limitless and can't be put in a box. They are not limited to finances nor solely things that can be bought with money. They can come in the form of spiritual gifts, presents for special occasions, and even those little "just because" surprises. The Giver loves to give and the receiver loves to receive. <b>The Giver delights in the delight of the receiver. </b>There is great Joy in the gift exchange. The Giver expects nothing in return. The receiver is not expected to give or do anything but simply accept what's given. <b>It's far more than the gift itself, it's an investment and stewardship of time:</b> listening, caring, interceding, waiting, seeking, and finding. He relentlessly pursues His kids as well as what He chooses to give to them. The process of finding the best gifts is to never be rushed. Often the Giver is silent and may seem distant while He's preparing the gift. There is awe and wonder to be found in the mystery. God is the Creator of creativity, He is extremely detailed in everything He does. There are a ton of gifts out there, the beauty of the Lord is that He doesn't just give away any old gift...He hand picks the gift He has for you that best fits your personality, style, need, desire, and unique design. <b>God does not give hand-me-downs</b>, there are no favorites in the Kingdom. You are His first choice and His most prized possession as His child.<br />
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Sometimes His gifts are presented very beautifully, all packaged up and shiny. Other times, it can look like the furthest thing from what we typically perceive as a gift. the word tells us that e<i>ven various trials are a gift. </i>It may look like making big decisions for ourselves, learning to say no and the best yes to things in order to protect the freedom we have. Boundaries are a precious gift in themselves. It can look like dealing with things of the past that's coming to the surface so you can finally move on and heal. It can be yet another disappointment, let down, or shocking change in events. I can be _______(insert trial and view it as a blessing instead of a curse...) He does everything within the most divine timing. His thoughts are not our thoughts and ways are not our ways, they are higher (Isaiah 55:8-9). Though the revealing of each present may appear in parts, His gifts are always complete and whole. He doesn't do anything half way. All of His gifts are good and for the best. Each gift is free to us because of that which wasn't free. On the cross, the ultimate price was paid which has made a way for us to fully receive today. Every gift is to reflect His heart and reveal more of His character. He's always after your heart. He outpours His perfect love and affection which can't be contained, causing an overflow. He's a good, good Father Who loves to lavish His gifts upon His sons and daughters.<br />
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Above all, He is the inexpressible gift and that's more than enough! He is all that we need both in abundance and lack.<br />
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“Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.” -James 1:2-4 MSG<br />
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“Thanks be to God for his inexpressible gift!” -2 Corinthians 9:15 ESV<br />
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“Every desirable and beneficial gift comes out of heaven. The gifts are rivers of light cascading down from the Father of Light. There is nothing deceitful in God, nothing two-faced, nothing fickle. He brought us to life using the true Word, showing us off as the crown of all his creatures.” -James 1:16-18 MSG<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-29749595826500659392016-05-08T21:07:00.003-05:002016-05-10T10:33:08.729-05:00A Mother to the MotherlessNo matter what category you may fall under concerning this Mother's Day, I think we can all be thankful that the Lord is not only "a father to the fatherless"-Psalm 68:5 but a mother to the motherless as well. Maybe you had a superwoman of a mom. One who always showed up, displayed love, and went through loops and hurdles to make your day brighter. Or maybe you had the mom who worked so many long and hard days trying her best to be present for events but always seemed to be too busy. Perhaps your dad was more like a mom to you packing your lunches, doing the laundry, and rocking the mini van. Maybe you had guardians instead such as an aunt or uncle that took you in as their own. Maybe you were raised in foster care or adopted. Maybe you had a grandmother who was more of a mother figure always letting you eat sweets, cutting off the edges of your grilled cheese sandwich, and exposing you to the daily beauty parlor gossip. Maybe you were your mother's mother setting her alarm clock and clothes out the night before so she could make it to work on time, hiding the bottles when she'd have too much to drink already, and loaning her money every time she's in a bind. Or maybe, just maybe, you had to be your own mother. You were the one who read the bedtime story and tucked yourself in at night. You were the one who taught yourself how to put on your clothes, tie your shoes, and fix your hair. You were the one who made sure you had all the school supplies you needed and had something, anything, to eat each day.<br />
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Even the best of moms are human and humans make mistakes. Humans will let each other down. All humans fall short. I think we can all relate to at least one point in time that we've longed for a mother's love in the moment of heartbreak, craved a mother's touch in the moment of despair, and wanted a mother's nurture when not feeling well. Regardless of what the word "mother" means to you, I'm here to tell you today that the Lord is the entire family unit. Have daddy issues? He's a good, good Father. Momma withdraws? He can rock you to sleep. Brother betrayal? He sticks closer than a brother. Sister absence? He is a the best listener. <br />
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To all you moms out there: bonus moms, step moms, spiritual moms, cat moms...</div>
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Know that the pressure is off. You can't be a mother until you've first been a daughter. Above all, you are His daughter and He is well pleased. Fully discovering your identity will help you see that even on those days when nothing goes right, everything wants to break, and you just can't seem to get your life together...He is still good and nothing you ever do or don't do will change His perfect love for you. </div>
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God is described as a woman in labor (Isaiah 42:14) and as having given birth to His people (Deuteronomy 32:18). He is compared to a nursing mother (Isaiah 49:15), to a comforting mother (Isaiah 66:13; Psalm 131:2), and to a mother teaching her child to walk (Hosea 11:3). God is described as a mother bear whose cubs have been taken away, as a hungry lioness (Hosea 13:8), as a mother eagle caring for her young (Deuteronomy 32:11-12), and as a mother hen (Matthew 23:37; Luke 13:34). David compared God to a woman (Psalm 123:2-3), and Jesus himself likened God to a woman cleaning her house to find a lost coin (Luke 15:8-10). God provided just enough healthy food for His people (Exodus 16:11-18), and He provides for us as well (Philippians 4:19). He urged His disciples to rest (Mark 6:31). He bandages our wounds (Psalm 147:3) and will wipe away our tears (Isaiah 25:8). He comforts us (Isaiah 51:12) and carries us close to His heart (Isaiah 40:11).</div>
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So here's to no longer putting God in a box. Anything you need, He not only gives it...He is it. He is love. He is peace. He is Joy. He always provides and protects. He works everything together for good. He makes all things new. He restores. He heals. He is a minister of reconciliation. Allow Him to show you His heart today whether He's the only mother you've ever truly had or you have a mother figure as an example here on earth. Either way we can celebrate motherhood the way He created it to be, beautiful and radiant.<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-72715445919381311772016-03-27T19:30:00.000-05:002016-04-07T03:44:52.644-05:00The Sweet Reveal "Now on the first day of the week Mary Magdalene came to the tomb early while it was still dark, and saw that the stone had been taken away from the tomb. So she ran and went to Simon, Peter, and the other disciple whom Jesus loved and said to them "They have taken the Lord out of the tomb, and we do not know where they have laid Him..." -John 20:1-3<br />
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"But Mary stood weeping outside the tomb, and as she wept she stooped to look into the tomb. And she saw two angels in white, sitting where the body of Jesus had lain, one at the head and one at the feet. They said to her, "Woman, why are you weeping?" She said to them, "They have taken away my Lord, and I do not know where they have laid Him." Having said this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing, but she did not know that it was Jesus. Jesus said to her, "Woman, why are you weeping?" Who are you seeking?" Supposing Him to be a gardener, she said to him, "Sir, if you have carried Him away, tell me where you have laid Him, and I will take Him away." Jesus said to her, <b>"Mary." </b>She turned around and said to him in Aramaic, "Rabboni!" (which means Teacher). Jesus said to her, <b>"Do not cling to me, for I have not yet ascended to the Father; but go to my brothers and say to them, "I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God." </b>Mary Magdalene went and announced to the disciples, "I have seen the Lord"-and that he had said these things to her."-John 20:11-18<br />
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"Now when He rose early on the first day of the week, He appeared first to Mary Magdalene, whom He had cast out seven demons. She went and told those who had been with Him, as they mourned and wept. But when they heard that He was alive and had been seen by her, they would not believe it."<br />
-Mark 16:9-11<br />
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Out of the many women I've looked up to in the bible such as Esther, a woman who was as courageous as she was beautiful or Ruth, a woman who's loyalty was stronger than her grief...there's one woman in the bible that, for some reason, God has really put on my mind a lot. Typically, someone who was once demon possessed wouldn't be the first person on the list as a potential role model. What's so special about her? Why do I feel like I can relate to her so much on this day two thousand years later? Many people saw this woman as a crazy lady all of her life. Why was she the first one at the tomb? Did she truly feel in her heart that this couldn't be the end? <br />
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Mary was an outcast. She probably had only a few friends, if any. I'm pretty sure she was lonely and depressed a lot. She must have felt as if there was no hope for her and this evil that had taken over her life. She was out of control but longed to have control. Jesus cast out seven demons that possessed her. What a miracle. Jesus became Mary's best friend, probably her only friend at the time. I'm pretty sure she found it very hard to shut up about what He had done in her life. Heck, He's the reason she's alive and free! I can relate to that. She was free from torment and manipulation because of Christ. She did not only know of Christ, she knew Him. She loved Him so much that she was restless after His death. I can't imagine what went through her mind this day 2,000 years ago. All the hope she gained through Christ was probably shaken and questioned. Was she crazy to be at the tomb so early before dark thinking "Is this really it?"<br />
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A part of me thinks Mary had a similar feeling. Mary still had faith that this was not the end. She believed that there had to be some reason why she felt led to go to the tomb. Maybe it was due to curiosity...maybe it was due to her still longing to spend time with Jesus. Even though the disciples left after searching the tomb for Jesus, she still felt led to stay. She stood weeping with the thought that someone had taken her Jesus away. She then felt led to look back in the tomb. That's when Jesus revealed Himself to her once again. After His death she still had a sense of hope. He was alive! HE IS ALIVE! I can't help but wonder what I would have done in this situation. I probably, like her, would have been so wrapped up in the fear of having my Jesus taken from me that I wouldn't comprehend the fact that He was right in front of me. What comfort, joy, peace, relief, and hope she must have felt in that moment. She responds "Rabboni!" which means teacher. This is one of the sweetest moments ever in my opinion. Mary loved Jesus so much and cherished her relationship with Him. She truly mourned His death which made seeing that He had resurrected that much sweeter. Both the angels and Jesus said to her "Woman, why are you weeping?" kind of as a way of being like "Woman, rejoice! Open your eyes and see what is happening in front of you." When she sees....oh man does she get it. This is a woman who has been rejected all of her life and thrown to the curb. Jesus saw her and delivered her from the things she could not control in her life. Jesus was her Everything. Because of her faithfulness, she saw Jesus after He rose from the dead! What an encouragement. If I were in this same situation, I honestly feel like I would have had the temptation to keep Jesus all to myself. After all, everyone will think I'm crazy and won't believe me right? Why not just enjoy time with Jesus and not worry about telling the disciples or any others? I'm pretty sure that's definitely something that Satan wanted to see happen. But Jesus said to her <b>"Do not cling to me, for I have not yet ascended to the Father; but go to my brothers and say to them, "I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God." </b>and she did just that. She couldn't keep silent about the miracle she witnessed. Why would you want to stay silent after experiencing such a thing? This moment for her was so sweet and special. But when trying to tell people that Jesus has risen, she was seen as crazy yet again. I'm pretty sure she didn't care what people thought at this point. She had Jesus and the assurance that He is Alive! She wasn't afraid to boldly speak the truth of the things she had seen and experienced.<br />
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The awesome thing about this is that unlike movies and story books that have happy endings...this is not a happy ending but more of a happy beginning. Through this Mary is not being the one glorified, but it is all about Jesus. Mary was making Jesus the Big deal. What I am wrestling with concerning this is "Will I live my life as if I'm mourning the fact that Jesus was in the tomb?" or "Will I live my life in such a way that it reflects the same hope and joy that His resurrection brought to Mary?" Will I reflect it so much that I won't care what anyone thinks or if people will believe me? I have my Jesus and I know that He is alive. No one can take Him away from me. Though it's easy to want to keep Him all to myself, I know that what He has done in my life can be the same for others. A lot of times it's so easy for me to get so wrapped up and stressed in everything that's going on that Jesus is saying to me "Woman, why are you weeping?" when I should be rejoicing in the fact that He is alive within me. Oh the faith that Mary Magdalene must of had that day. It's a faith I am beginning to pray more for. The faith in knowing that my Jesus is capable of overcoming the grave. He did overcome the grave. My beautiful Jesus overcame death. If my Jesus is Bigger than death, than I know that my Jesus is Bigger than any struggle that I face. I have been delivered from a life of torment and manipulation. He became my friend at a time that I was friendless. God calls me daughter.Because of the cross, I'm adopted into the bloodline of Christ. He cast out the evil that was in my life and the things that I could not control. He saw me as someone who was precious when others saw me as an outcast, a rebel, and one who was crazy. He Reveals Himself to me which calls for the sweetest and most intimate moments that no other relationship can give or ever compare.<br />
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"Because He lives, I can face tomorrow. Because He lives, all Fear is gone."<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-79592538767327016292015-11-26T20:58:00.002-06:002015-11-26T21:26:18.860-06:00Never Alone<span style="font-family: inherit;">Thanksgiving has always been a hard day for me, not to mention holidays in general. Some of the most traumatic and painful memories fall on this day. It's also a day that can become very lonely, causing a deep depressive state. Praise God these things are beginning to grow strangely dim the more the light of His presence shines upon me. This is not my first Thanksgiving alone by all means. However, this is the first year that I had nowhere to go for the holidays and my Mammaw is no longer living. When I was her primary care giver I'd always make a point to decorate her house from top to bottom, doing anything and everything to make it a great experience for her. Being able to care for her made these dreadful days more bearable. This time around it's been different. It's hard to shake off the nightmares and flashbacks when the demons come out to play. It's not always fun sitting in a room all day all alone when everyone is busy spending time with family and practically everything is closed. It's easy to feel unworthy and undeserving of a family when the hopes of having one fade away time and time again. It's tempting to listen to the voices of condemnation. It's a choice to control your thoughts or let your thoughts control you. Today has not been the most glamorous of days yet at the same time it hasn't been the darkest either. Being able to serve and love on others is such a beautiful gift. The Lord constantly uses it to redirect my focus and worship Him for all that He is.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">A shift has occurred in my life lately more so than ever before. Starting in August I began to really seek not just the things of the Lord, but God Himself. He radically changed everything I ever knew about life and Him. He took off my blindfold of logic and showed me how to have true faith and trust in the unpredictable. He stripped away everything I used to find identity in until it was literally just me and Him. In a lot of ways it's still just me and Him, especially on days like today. What makes today different? The daily renewing of the mind, time in the word, practice of thankfulness, the trust throughout the process, the honoring of the season, the sweet victory of the Cross, real rest, and the intimacy of the Father just to name a few ;) </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Today I could go on and on about what I'm thankful for. I'm thankful for Jesus Who sweeps me off my feet, a place to live, community, family through the blood of Christ, a vehicle, the chance to finish school, several jobs, the opportunity to travel once again, cats, tap shoes, boxing gloves, journals, feather pins, music, hands and feet, and all the brilliantly funny videos/memes that exist in the world today. I'm thankful for you for taking the time to read this. I'm thankful for Native Americans. I'm thankful for all people of all nations, every tribe and every tongue. I'm even thankful for the past, no longer in a way that glorifies any situation or circumstance but my Father alone. The Lord truly works everything together for good-Romans 8:28. He's put this girl to much use that has endured terrible abuse. He's turned my mourning into joy. He's brought beauty from pain. He's provided His strength in my weakness. He took a girl who was starving and made her hopeful. He showed a girl who thought she was unworthy that she was a daughter all along. He wipes away every tear and is the well that never runs dry. He brings laughter out of sorrow. He can erase and replace every remembrance of terror with the perfect love that casts out every fear. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">One of the main things I've learned about the character of God during this season is that He makes ALL things new. Lately I've returned to a lot of old things I used to be involved with: Music School, job in the Visual and Performing Arts, and even being called back to Southeast Asia. He has made each of these areas new. I'm thankful that He makes the everyday mundane fresh and exciting. He is constant and never changes yet He can change things. He has changed things. He is changing things. He will change things. So as I sit here by myself, I'm not by myself. All day as I've been alone, I haven't been alone. He is with me. He lives inside of me. He foreknew me. He's goes before me. He never leaves me. He's always for me. He's my Daddy and I'm His little girl. I'm thankful that He is my Father, Mother, sister, and brother all in one and so much more! The world tells me I'm an orphan, my Daddy tells me I'm His. The enemy tells me I'm unwanted, the Lord calls me His precious jewel. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">To all of you who find this day difficult as well, hold on. He holds the universe and most certainly can hold you. Don't be afraid, let His love wash away all the anxiety. Talk to Him and He will listen. Spend time with Him and He will reveal to you His heart for the one, you're the one. It's okay to not be okay, He wants to mend what's broken and just asks that you stay. You don't have to hide from Him, you can hide in Him. He's a hiding place. a safe Haven where you can be vulnerable in the best of ways. Don't give up, give into what He has for you for it is good. He is the light in the darkness of night. The enemy is a liar, not the Prince of Peace. He can make your sleep sweet and restore your identity. He has the power to make this day new. He has the wisdom to know what's best for you. Remember, there may be pain in the night but Joy comes in the morning-Psalm 30:5. </span><span style="font-family: inherit; text-align: center;">Will you trust Him? He's worth it. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="text Prov-3-5" id="en-ESV-16461" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px; position: relative;">"Trust in the <span class="small-caps" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span> with all your heart,</span></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="indent-1" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span class="indent-1-breaks" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.42em; line-height: 0;"> </span><span class="text Prov-3-5" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; position: relative;">and <span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-16461B" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-16461B" title="See cross-reference B">B</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.625em; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span>do not lean on your own understanding.</span></span></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="text Prov-3-6" id="en-ESV-16462" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px; position: relative;"><span class="versenum" style="box-sizing: border-box; display: block; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; left: -4.4em; line-height: 22px; position: absolute; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="text Prov-3-6" id="en-ESV-16462" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px; position: relative;">In all your ways <span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-16462C" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-16462C" title="See cross-reference C">C</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.625em; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span>acknowledge Him,</span></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="indent-1" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span class="indent-1-breaks" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.42em; line-height: 0;"> </span><span class="text Prov-3-6" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; position: relative;">and He <span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-16462D" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-16462D" title="See cross-reference D">D</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.625em; font-size: 0.625em; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span>will make straight your paths." -Proverbs 3:5-6</span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small; line-height: 24px;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="line-height: 24px;">"When you lie down,</span><span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-16480A" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-16480A" title="See cross-reference A">A</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.625em; font-size: 0.625em; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span><span style="line-height: 24px;"> you will not be afraid; </span></span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large; line-height: 24px;">when you lie down, your sleep</span><span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-16480C" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-16480C" title="See cross-reference C">C</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.625em; font-size: 0.625em; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large; line-height: 24px;"> will be sweet." -Proverbs 3:24</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="indent-1" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span class="text Prov-3-24" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: small; position: relative;"><br /></span></span></span><span style="line-height: 0px;">"He alone is my rock and salvation, a fortress where I will not be </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="line-height: 0px;"><br /></span></span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large; line-height: 0px;">shaken." -Psalm 62:2 </span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span>
</span><br />
<div class="version-ESV result-text-style-normal text-html " style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;">
<div style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px; margin-bottom: 10px;">
<span class="text 1John-4-18" id="en-ESV-30605" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><span style="line-height: 22px;"><b>"</b></span><span style="line-height: 24px;">There is no fear in love, but </span><span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-30605A" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-30605A" title="See cross-reference A">A</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.625em; font-size: 0.625em; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span><span style="line-height: 24px;">perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not </span><span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-ESV-30605B" data-link="(<a href="#cen-ESV-30605B" title="See cross-reference B">B</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.625em; font-size: 0.625em; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span><span style="line-height: 24px;">been perfected in love." -1 John 4:18 </span></span></span></div>
<div style="line-height: 20px;">
<span class="text 1John-4-18" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-4676254844420954462015-10-06T20:30:00.000-05:002015-10-09T12:12:01.249-05:00Healing is In His Hands<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 7.5pt;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><i><span style="font-family: Garamond;">"A woman in the crowd had suffered
for twelve years with constant bleeding. She had suffered a great deal
from many doctors, and over the years she had spent everything she had to pay
them, but she had gotten no better. In fact, she had gotten worse. She had
heard about Jesus, so she came up behind him through the crowd and touched his
robe. For she thought to herself, “If I can just touch His robe, I will be
healed.” Immediately the bleeding stopped, and she could feel in her body
that she had been healed of her terrible condition. Jesus realized at once
that healing power had gone out from Him, so He turned around in the crowd and
asked, “Who touched My robe?” His disciples said to Him, “Look at
this crowd pressing around You. How can You ask, ‘Who touched
Me?" But He kept on looking around to see who had done it. Then
the frightened woman, trembling at the realization of what had happened to her,
came and fell to her knees in front of Him and told him what she had
done. And He said to her, “Daughter, your faith has made you well. Go
in peace. Your suffering is over.” -Mark 5:25-34</span></i><span class="MsoCommentReference"> </span></span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></i><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfX9B19LkKccwNBJRxfWGy1lmDagXUuWwJYg3JMQqgBIrXD6TcHy9bTclHCCdEEq67mmPM_qbVcHB8s4XJtwWzVMgCz_XNIuN5-t5Kx22-vPmhYoL1h3zLsbREmHrWFJM9n2R2ev5a-do/s1600/jesus_woman20bleeding-1-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfX9B19LkKccwNBJRxfWGy1lmDagXUuWwJYg3JMQqgBIrXD6TcHy9bTclHCCdEEq67mmPM_qbVcHB8s4XJtwWzVMgCz_XNIuN5-t5Kx22-vPmhYoL1h3zLsbREmHrWFJM9n2R2ev5a-do/s400/jesus_woman20bleeding-1-1.jpg" width="365" /></a></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span class="MsoCommentReference"><br /></span></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">This nameless woman had </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">suffered twelve </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">long years
of chronic menstrual bleeding. The fact that she had been bleeding for this
long suggests that she was most likely infertile as well-- not </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">to mention
she was probably severely anemic and weak, especially considering she was </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">living in a
society with an iron-poor diet</span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">. She was
bound to constantly feel tired and lethargic</span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">To sum it
up—her health was not the best. </span><span class="MsoCommentReference"><span style="font-size: 8.0pt;"><span style="mso-special-character: comment;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">According to
Leviticus 15:19-28, this woman was also </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">considered
to be unclean during the entire time that she bled. In the </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Mosaic law, women who were unclean weren't allowed
to touch anyone for they would then be considered unclean as well. This kept
her from participating in any religious services or activities. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Even if she could bear</span><span class="MsoCommentReference"><span style="font-size: 8.0pt;"><span style="mso-special-character: comment;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">children, her husband (if she had one), would not
come near her due to her status. In this woman's culture,
motherhood was viewed as the supreme female virtue. A woman's security in old
age came from her family. For this woman to be childless was a constant glimpse
into what would look like a very lonely future.</span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">This woman was DESPERATE and DETERMINED to find
Jesus</span></b><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">. </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Not to find another doctor and receive yet another
empty promise of a potential cure. Instead, her strongest desire was to find the
ultimate Healer</span><span style="font-family: Garamond;"><span style="font-size: small;">. </span>After all, the physicians of her time were unable
to relieve her suffering.<span style="font-size: large;"> She</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><i><span style="font-size: large;">"had endured much under many doctors. She
had spent everything she had and was not helped at all. On the contrary, she
became worse."</span></i></span><span style="font-family: Garamond;"><span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Her physical body was unhealthy. Her faith, however, remained firm in the midst of all of her troubles. The odds were not in </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">her favor...instead, all odds were against
her. </span><span style="font-family: Garamond;"><span style="font-size: large;">For her to become well again seemed </span></span><span style="font-family: Garamond;"><span style="font-size: large;">impossible. Yet, she chose to believe that she
could be healed.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: large;">That within itself is HUGE. She heard about a man who could</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><i><span style="font-size: large;">"heal
many who had various diseases"</span>(Mark 1: 34<a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=1096836652101730412">)</a></i><span style="font-size: 12pt;">, </span></span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">and she didn't doubt in such a power. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Garamond;"><span style="font-size: large;">So </span></span><span style="font-family: Garamond;"><span style="font-size: large;">she traveled 30 miles to Capernaum. She quietly
came up behind Jesus in the crowd and simply touched His cloak. For she said</span> <span style="font-size: large;"><i>"If
I could just touch His robes, I'll be made well!"</i> </span></span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">By law, this would
have made Jesus unclean, </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">but by grace, a miracle unfolded</span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">. Immediately her bleeding stopped. Without a
single word being spoken to her, she was made whole simply by believing that He could
heal her and choosing to act on that belief. Her faith was rewarded and it did
not go unnoticed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Jes</span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">us felt power leave Him and asked who had touched
Him. The disciples gave a typical answer basically saying that it could've been
anyone in the large crowd that surrounded Him. Jesus was determined to find who
it was. At this moment, this woman had a choice</span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">. She could have stayed silent and or ran away in
her fear. Instead she chose to be BOLD and COURAGEOUS and kneeled down before
Jesus, despite her fear and trembling. She told Jesus the whole truth and admitted
to being the one who touched Him. <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">She, the
unclean woman, told Jesus, the spotless lamb, that she touched His cloak. </b></span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Oh the thoughts that must have raced through
her mind during that moment. The </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">same faith that gave her the strength to reach out
and touch Jesus was the same faith that empowered her to be the one who stepped
forward in the crowd. She risked public humiliation and punishment to confess
the faith she had in Jesus. Wow. </span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Garamond;"><span style="font-size: large;">Then</span></span><span style="font-family: Garamond;"><span style="font-size: large;">, Jesus said one single word that swept away twelve
years’ worth of pain and isolation. </span><i><span style="font-size: large;">"Daughter..." </span><span style="font-size: small;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">In no other gospel account did</span><span class="MsoCommentReference"><span style="font-size: 8.0pt;"><span style="mso-special-character: comment;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> Jesus use this term of endearment and respect, and
He chose to say this to the woman who was</span><span class="MsoCommentReference"><span style="font-size: 8.0pt;"><span style="mso-special-character: comment;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">seen as unclean. H</span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">e called the untouchable "Daughter". This name
meant she belonged to a family. This name meant that she has been restored to
her community. This name meant she was loved. This showed the Father's heart through the Son. </span><span class="MsoCommentReference"><span style="font-size: 8.0pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i><span style="font-family: Garamond;">"</span></i><i><span style="font-family: Garamond;">Daughter, your faith has made you well. Go in PEACE and be
FREE from your affliction."</span></i></span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">She saw first hand the truth of Mark 6:56! Not only was she healed
physically, but emotionally too</span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">. Isn't that what every woman needs? Healing not
just physically, </span><span style="font-family: Garamond;"><span style="font-size: large;">but emotionally?</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: large;">Jesus knows our hearts and just
how to comfort them.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><i><span style="font-size: large;">"There is a balm in Gilead to make the wounded
whole"</span></i><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: large;">my dear friend<a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=1096836652101730412" style="mso-comment-date: 20151006T1758; mso-comment-reference: LH_38;"></a><span style="mso-comment-continuation: 38;">s</span></span></span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">, </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">and this woman was able to proclaim just that.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Twelve years ago I was diagnosed with Endometriosis, the same incurable
autoimmune disease that studies show this woman in the B</span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">ible most likely had. This diagnosis, </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">along with a genetic vitamin D deficiency tends to
make life rather difficult. Being told at a young age that you're most likely
infertile and may not have kids one day is </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">heartbreaking. So is </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">being told if you ever were able to become pregnant,
you are most likely to have a miscarriage or die when giving birth. As</span><span class="MsoCommentReference"><span style="font-size: 8.0pt;"><span style="mso-special-character: comment;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I've become older</span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">, my condition has become worse. There are some
days that I can't get out of bed. It's hard to function normally when </span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">you feel so weak that you could pass out at any
moment. My immune system often gets attacked,</span><span class="MsoCommentReference"><span style="font-size: 8.0pt;"><span style="mso-special-character: comment;"> </span></span></span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">causing me to get sick very easily and often. This
kind of sick is harder to fight and get over than the typical sinus infection
or flu—</span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">it’s on-going and never fully goes away. There are several
medications and surgeries that could be performed to help with the disease, </span><span style="font-family: Garamond;"><span style="font-size: large;">but there is no ultimate fix for the problem. It has become so bad lately that doctors have tried to convince me to have a
hysterectomy before I'm 30 due to being at such a high risk for ovarian
cancer. </span><span style="font-size: large;">I
never really put a lot of thought into having kids until I was told it might be</span><span style="font-size: small;">
</span><span style="font-size: large;">impossible, but thankfully God has called me to adopt one day no matter what.</span></span><span class="MsoCommentReference"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">It's easy
to</span><span class="MsoCommentReference"><span style="mso-special-character: comment;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">want to question God when health issues arise and
diseases are diagnosed. It's easy to become numb to everything and deny that
anything is wrong. It's easy to allow the awkwardness to cause embarrassment that keeps you from sharing boulders that need to be shared within a safe community. Jesus didn't walk on earth alone, so why should we? He had intimacy with the Father and close relationships with the disciples. Jesus is always the ultimate game changer. He heals
wounded hearts and restores health to the unhealthy. He comforts a woman's
emotions by making her feel important and noticed. He reminds you that you are
a part of a family that will never disown you. Mmmm...isn't Jesus good? So as I
continue the on-going battle of illness, I'm comforted in knowing that God is
still bigger than all the what-if's</span><span class="MsoCommentReference"><span style="mso-special-character: comment;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">and potential outcomes. I choose to expect the
unexpected and leave it in God's hands. I continue to spend time in the war
room and secret place. I pray that I can have the same faith as this nameless
woman. I want to have such a faith that Jesus will look to me and say
"Daughter, your Faith has made you well. Go in Peace and be FREE from you
affliction."</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: small; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">This is my same challenge to each of you. To have the same faith as our
nameless sister who bled for 12 years. Be strong. Be Courageous. Be Bold. Be
Determined. Be Faithful. Be HANDS & FEET. Remain fervent in prayer. Rest in the fact that you are a daughter and He is well-pleased. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Garamond; font-size: small; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">There
is power in the name of Jesus to break every chain.</span><br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen="" class="YOUTUBE-iframe-video" data-thumbnail-src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/j2W88vWt30A/0.jpg" frameborder="0" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/j2W88vWt30A?feature=player_embedded" width="320"></iframe><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="YOUTUBE-iframe-video" data-thumbnail-src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/2VNbeYCxtEw/0.jpg" frameborder="0" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/2VNbeYCxtEw?feature=player_embedded" width="320"></iframe><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="YOUTUBE-iframe-video" data-thumbnail-src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Z_CQi0pXOPI/0.jpg" frameborder="0" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/Z_CQi0pXOPI?feature=player_embedded" width="320"></iframe><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="YOUTUBE-iframe-video" data-thumbnail-src="https://i.ytimg.com/vi/-pD2zIuiC2g/0.jpg" frameborder="0" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/-pD2zIuiC2g?feature=player_embedded" width="320"></iframe></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-37624856031795480742013-07-12T17:46:00.002-05:002015-10-06T16:24:45.058-05:00I See a Generation Rising<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">During the last week of June and the beginning of July I served as both a bible study teacher and a family group leader for two weeks of Cross Camp. This week was extremely encouraging and uplifting to say the least. So many kids nailed down their faith after having doubts and
uncertainty for so long. Due to the bravery of kids that were leaders in
their youth groups examining their hearts before God, a spark was ignited within other students which was amazing to see such a ripple
affect occur. During this particular <span class="text_exposed_show">week God chose
to use me to encourage and minister to both students and leaders which
was very humbling. Leading 8th grade girls Bible study and Family group
12 was incredible in which some of those kids taught me more than I
taught them during week one. I had the huge privilege to see students encouraging and
ministering to other students at camp which was a beautiful thing to
observe. They genuinely cared for each other and worked hard at getting
along with everyone in family groups and so on. I saw students come
together and rejoice greatly clapping and cheering each time a new
salvation, call to ministry, and commitment was announced. This gives me HOPE in this generation. There are youth out
there that Love the Lord and have a burning desire to please and serve
Him. I was blessed to see that first hand during week one of camp. It was so good
for my heart and soul. </span></span><br />
<br />
<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}"><span class="text_exposed_show">Not only do I feel that God has placed within me such a heavy burden for the youth of today, I also feel like He is choosing to speak through me in order to be a voice for them as well. Though there were many things that I saw from today's youth that were very encouraging...there were also things that discouraged my heart. Many of these kids felt all Alone. They felt as if there was no one they could confide in in their areas...even in their own youth groups and churches. Many kids, like me, had parents who did not go to church. They came with broken hearts that needed mended, wounds that needed healing, and baggage that needed to be dealt with. God did some Amazing things. He changed lives and brought Joy to these youth in ways that only He could. The thing that burdened me however was what are these kids going back to? Many of them truly desired to follow God with everything that they are. It breaks my heart knowing that many of them had to go back home to a place where no one was there to listen to them, disciple them, and show them love. </span></span><br />
<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}"><span class="text_exposed_show"><br /></span></span>
<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}"><span class="text_exposed_show">The youth of today need encouragement as much as, if not more than, generations of the past. They need to be fed spiritually and poured into so that they may pour out. I feel strongly that God has placed it on my heart to ask each of you to get on your knees for this generation. They need it. I've seen so much potential in today's youth to which it completely blows my mind when imagining what God can do in and through them. It breaks my heart to see many of them go home and not receive the Love, encouragement, and affirmation that they so desperately need. LOVE on these youth. PRAY for them. UPLIFT them and let them know that not only should they let anyone look down on them for their youth, but they should also be confident in the things God has called them to. I see God raising up strong warriors to build up and edify His kingdom. Because of this I feel such a strong urge, more than ever, to show love to these kids. It's exciting to see such an incredible young generation rising that is bold, brilliant, passionate, hungry, thirsty, and on fire for God! Please join with me in praying for them and so much more. </span></span><br />
<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}"><span class="text_exposed_show"><br /></span></span>
<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}"><span class="text_exposed_show">"I see a generation Rising up to take their place with self-less faith. Self-less faith....I see a near revival stirring as we pray and seek. We're on our knees. We're on our knees...Heal my heart and make it clean. Open up my eyes to the things unseen. Show me how to Love like You have loved me. Break my heart for what breaks Yours. Everything I am for Your kingdom's cause."</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFY8nUZYL0-bw9TqqoU-_Uc9szLZLlrIDdaP0y7BJotG9uO52VFvQTXuc0tv5IMb8oAw878bd3dlJayDtUSnQMpF0U3mjwafNAspHFOs7ky1-GZJtGM9Z6eCjNtn7mwrEhA9oYF1TR_Ks/s1600/1003265_10152582461139041_1230199948_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFY8nUZYL0-bw9TqqoU-_Uc9szLZLlrIDdaP0y7BJotG9uO52VFvQTXuc0tv5IMb8oAw878bd3dlJayDtUSnQMpF0U3mjwafNAspHFOs7ky1-GZJtGM9Z6eCjNtn7mwrEhA9oYF1TR_Ks/s640/1003265_10152582461139041_1230199948_n.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}"><span class="text_exposed_show"><br /></span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-3836298801440319502013-07-09T11:39:00.002-05:002013-07-10T13:08:28.960-05:00Free Flying<span id="goog_2118405772"></span><span id="goog_2118405773"></span>Have you ever closed your eyes and seen things that are indescribable? Have you seen something so vivid and clear as if you were literally in a whole other place? I certainly have. Heck, all my life I've been able to close my eyes and go to anywhere I'd like when allowing my mind to do so. My Creator, God, has created me to be a very creative individual. While some view A.D.D. to be a curse, I a lot of times see it as a blessing. The way He reveals things to me is hard to put into words sometimes. Luckily, He has not only created me to be a musician but also a writer. Though it may be hard for me to express how I feel vocally, on paper I could write for days.<br />
<br />
You see, there is both good and bad that comes with being a very visual person. My photographic memory is very strong which allows me to memorize music very quickly as well as other subjects. Of course with strengths there are also weaknesses. I feel that because I have this particular strength, it has become the very thing that Satan has used against me for years. Satan chooses to use my past to haunt me both in my sleep and when I awake. Due to being so visual, flashbacks attack my mind and try to take over. It's rare that a day goes by that I don't have to fight hard against this war with the Devil as he attempts to play with my mind.<br />
<br />
Not too long ago I watched the movie Batman Begins and recalled one of the main points I've gotten from the movie. Batman's fear crippled him. It was his weakness. Evil used it against him to try and bring him down. It wasn't until he chose to become fear that he was able to conquer this great height. Suddenly, his immense fear of bats became his biggest strength. This fueled him to move beyond the past and terrors that would wake him in the night.<br />
<br />
Satan used my fear of being hurt to cripple me for far too long. During the daytime I could find ways to distract myself from some of his tactics but each night, as soon as I would close my eyes, the nightmares would appear and the flashbacks would entice my fear. <br />
<br />
During the last weekend of May I attended the LIFT conference for worship leaders held at Passion City Church. So many great things happened to which I am still trying to grasp my mind around. One of the main things was my FREEDOM. Yes, freedom (read this as if you're watching Braveheart). During night one of worship I began to weep. I was in the middle of trying to worship God and just couldn't go to the places I normally could go to when I closed my eyes. It broke my heart. Usually when I'd close my eyes I could see this:<br />
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LAKE MALAWI </div>
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The sunrise on Lake Malawi in Africa </div>
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Looking out the window on the way to China </div>
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The Cliffs of Moher in Ireland</div>
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But this particular night I couldn't see anything while trying to worship. Not only could I not see anything, I couldn't sing the words and truly mean what I was saying. I knew if I continued to sing it'd just be making noise. I felt as if then and there God was moving me to just sit down and allow Him to do a work within me. So, I sat down and oh did He work. I began to close my eyes and just listen to the music that was surrounding me in the room. Immediately a flash of images raced through my mind. Now, all of the things I am fixing to share will sound very crazy most likely....that's because it is crazy. It's like nothing I've ever experienced while worshiping. I began to visualize the first picture above of lake Malawi. It's like I was there all over again hearing the waves crashing and feeling the wind blowing strong. All seemed peaceful. Then it began to storm. The sea was raging and the fear became crippling. As I sat there and saw these images run through my mind I began wishing for it to be dry. I then saw the clouds roll away, the sea disappear, the sun come out, and everything beginning to die around me. Nothing was green, the dust was overwhelming, and everything looked so lifeless and tired. Then I found myself wishing to see water again. I then found my self in the midst of the ocean drowning. The fear returned and everything seemed so hopeless. Then out of the blue was a victorious right hand reaching into the dark and deep ocean with a light around it. I saw myself grabbing the hand and being pulled up. Now, above water, I gasped for air. The very next thing I saw as my eyes were closed during this song that was being played was the shore line with a single chair placed on the sand. All was peaceful and well. I then saw myself sitting down in the chair and another chair appeared by my side. </div>
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I know... I know....Weird right? Crazy. I was as thrown off by it as all who reads this. Like I said, I never had an experience like this before during worship. It was so vivid and clear as if I was truly there. I honestly feel God placed these images in my head for a reason. As I stayed up that night trying to make sense of everything God had placed on my heart and mind....things began to click a little. Five years ago I was delivered from a very destructive upbringing. Since then it has been a rollercoaster of life events for me. From learning what it's like to be bold and share my story with others to dealing with death, heartache, burn out, wandering, and let downs....it's been a heck of a journey with God. I've experienced times where all was well and wonderful. However, I'd take it for granted and forget to praise God in the midst of the good times. Then the storms would come into my life again. I've grown used to the storms these days. They've always seemed to come and go for me. It's almost easier for me to Praise God in the midst of those storms. Often times I would beg God for the storms to die. Then I'd get in over my head. I had to learn the hard way to let my "yes be a yes" and my "no be a no".... I did too much in order to make myself feel that I was worthy enough of being used by God. Then came the big burn out. I spent almost a full year chasing shadows that wouldn't satisfy. I was living in a desert land where all was dry and my heart was apathetic. I then ran back to God and things seemed good again. However, I forgot what it was like to be in the water and trust Him. I became overwhelmed with church and the things of God that I began to drown in it. I'd serve Him and do everything I felt I should do without ever going to God Himself to pour into me so that I could pour out. Then....oh boy...then....God reached His hand to me and pulled me up. He rescued me yet again and brought me to the shore. SO, this is where I am now in my life. I am at the shore. Sitting in that chair that has been empty for too long. And I am Not alone. There is a chair beside me and though I may not always see it, I feel it. I feel the power of the Holy Spirit within me. It is stirring up my passion and compassion for others and eternal things. I'm so relieved to be at this place in my life again. A place where I know that I am where I need to be and I am doing what I am called to do. Ultimately I am called to make much of Christ...Not much of myself or others....but much of Christ.<br />
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This all occurred during night one of worship at the LIFT conference. By the last night of this conference I began worshiping all out when I realized the song I was worshiping to was the same song I sat down for on night one. I closed my eyes and every single image raced through my mind once again. Then came the overwhelming feeling of FREEDOM. I've never felt so free to worship my King. With no holding back and no distractions, I danced for joy lifting praise to my Father in Heaven! Louie Giglio then said that God had laid something on his heart that he felt led to share. He said "I feel that some of you have been burnt out and holding back for far too long. I know you, because I am you. I've been there and done that. Many of you are like a dove trapped in a cage just waiting to be free. It's time that you stop letting your life situations, the people who have hurt you, and your fears cripple you from breaking free! Let God open that cage door. It's time you start soaring for God again. Lift out yours hands and fly!" Uh......say what!?!? At first I was like "Wow, that is so ironic...." then I was like"Dang....my God is so good and truly works all things together."<br />
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Needless to say that night I broke free and soared. I made the decision to stop letting that fear cripple me any longer. Though this in itself scares the mess out of me most times. I let God open that door to the cage I stayed trapped in for too long. Now I've become fear. Fear to Satan that is. I've caused him to fear that I could be a world changer for God and be unstoppable when chasing after Jesus with everything that I am. Is Satan still fighting back now that he see's me more of a threat? Oh yes, more than ever. However, in the midst of this huge battle...God is still doing what He does best. He is still shinning provision and protection over my life. So now instead of allowing my fears to cripple me, I'm allowing it to fuel my passion and push me even further into the waters.<br />
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With all this being share, this is what God has laid on my heart to tell to each of you who have chosen to read this blog entry:<br />
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"Stop living trapped in the cage. Let God open the door. You won't regret it. Be the dove that has been released and fly like never before! He's equipped you with armor. He is by your side. BE FREE and always remember to run into His arms."<br />
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"Be strong. Take courage. Don't be intimidated...Because God, your God, is striding ahead of you. He's right there with you. He won't let you down. He won't leave you." ~Deuteronomy 31:6<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-67700926296217940942012-12-21T13:54:00.004-06:002015-04-04T18:32:26.465-05:00My Best Friend<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Words can't describe just how much Love I had for my Mammaw and how deep her love was for me. She took care of me and was there through the most difficult and challenging times of my life and in return, I was fortunate to do the same as she aged over the years . To lose the only blood family I feel that I have is a pain that few must experience. Christmas and the holidays have always been hard times and now, they will be even harder. I surely miss my best friend that always made me laugh and is the reason that I am the woman I am today. If you were to ask any of Kathleen Moore's nine grandchildren or ten great grandchildren was their Mammaw Moore the best in the world, the answer would always be yes. Her heart was so big and her 88 years of life was nothing but genuinely loving and caring for anyone and everyone she'd come in contact with. Out of the many roles I've been called to play in life, being her granddaughter, primary care giver, and close friend is by far something I've held of the utmost importance. It is such a blessing to have grown up under the love and care of my best friend for 21 years. I really miss that sweet lil ole woman dearly, but beyond humbled and thankful for the amazing relationship we had and above all the relationship Kathleen Moore had with the Lord.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">Still living in what used to be my Mammaw's house is very hard, yet rewarding. All of the sweet memories I have are very vivid and strong when here at home. My Mammaw was the biggest sweet tooth you'd ever meet. She always had a bountiful stash of sweets and treats here. This woman practically raised me and taught me everything I know. I stayed at her house more than my own all of my life. Here in the Lakeshore neighborhood, Kathleen Moore was a very popular lady. I remember spending time each day putting together goody bags with my Mammaw to pass out to everyone down the block. We'd hop in her blue oldsmobile car and go house to house visiting all the other home bound senior citizens in the area. My Mammaw knew Everyone. I learned so much history from hearing story after story from my Mammaw and her friends. This house was known for being the best house to come to during Halloween. All the trick or treaters would come by the dozen to see what awesome candy Kathleen Moore had to offer each year. She always loved kids. She would always take in neighborhood kids in as her own. </span><br />
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<span style="line-height: 20px;">When school was out during the holidays or summer break, my Mammaw and I would have a blast. Each morning I'd wake up she would fix me a grilled cheese sandwich , with the crust cut off, and sometimes bacon. Then we'd be lazy and stay in our pajamas till around lunch time watching re-runs of the Golden Girls and any other old classic show you could imagine. It always cracked me up when she'd make us watch Who Wants to Be a Millionaire because she secretly had a crush on Regis Philbin, haha. Around eleven o'clock or so we'd finally change and clean up to seize the day of activities! She refused to leave the house without her make-up on, though all she ever put on was lipstick and face lotion. She was always so pretty and beautiful even as she aged. I've looked at so many pictures of her from her youth and her skin was always so soft with a clear complexion. After we'd get dressed we'd pick a place to eat, if we didn't end up eating at home. We'd either eat at the original Ray's PeGe, Dainken Trail, or McDonald's. While out and about we'd stop by the bank and she always said she had a few "extra" dollars left over that she didn't know what to do with so she'd take me to the dollar store to pick out something fun. I usually found a new coloring book that she would help choose. My Mammaw not only let me buy coloring books and color at her house, she'd color with me and enjoyed it equally as much if not more. She literally saved Every single coloring book page her grandchildren colored while at her house. She always had us put our name and the date on it and told us we did a great job. She also saved a lot of her own coloring book pages with her signature on it, haha. After eating lunch back at the house we'd occasionally go to the beauty shop for a hair appointment. Of course, she was popular their too. My Mammaw was always a talker, she loved to socialize with others and catch up. She also was the best listener. She was always there if you needed someone to talk to just for the sake of talking. When we'd return home we'd watch her soap operas like Bold and the Beautiful or As the World Turns. Then I'd help her clean house and grocery shop. Every time I'd spend the night we would lay down in her bed and put the t.v. on to help us fall asleep. We'd talk for the next hour or so about anything and everything. We shared many giggles and sweet moments in the midst of our deliriousness. She'd tell me her dreams that she had for herself and for me. </span></span><br />
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<span style="line-height: 20px;">I've always struggled in academics. Having both ADD and dyslexia makes school work and reading very challenging. I've always loved to write, however. She always told me how that made us alike, our love for writing things down and expressing how we felt. When I started to really get into the whole writing thing, she began to let me use her old type writer at the house and told me to write however much I liked and to always let her read. I'd spend hours on that type writer and would write several poems and short stories to give to her to read. She always told me to never stop chasing my dreams. She Loved music as well. Though she never played any instruments, she constantly listened to music. I grew up always hearing Big Band music on the record player at her house. Any genre you could think of, she listened to. She'd bob her head and tap her foot when she heard a melody and would hum it everywhere she went. She is probably the only little old woman I knew that actually enjoyed hearing a loud drum set being played. Though she was never able to make it to any of my concerts since I began playing, she always encouraged me and cheered me on. Sometimes I'd give her a shaker or tambourine so she could play along with me while I played drums. We always had fun jam sessions and she never seized to amaze me with her taste in music and the support she constantly bestowed. </span></span><br />
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<span style="line-height: 20px;">Every weekday during the year I'd be dropped off at her house early in the morning before school. She'd fix me breakfast and watch Saved By the Bell with me. She'd make sure I had all my books and would encourage me to do my very best. I'd walk down the street to Lakeshore Elementary and walk back once school let out. Eveyday I'd walk back to see her waiting in the carport for me. Her face would light up when she saw me walking towards her and she'd tell me how excited she was that I was back home. Little did she know that I was bullied throughout elementary school and was acting out due to the things that surrounded me growing up. The way she'd look me in the eyes and tell me how she knew the good things I was capable of...man, it was life changing to say the least. We'd sit on the carport a little while watching the squirrels and eating a snack that she always had ready for me. She'd make sure I did my homework then we'd watch some television. </span><span style="line-height: 20px;">She would study the guide channel to see when my favorite nickelodeon or cartoon network shows would come on so she could have it set on the t.v. when I'd get home from school.</span><span style="line-height: 20px;"> I'd be at her house till 5 or 6pm if not later. I'd stay there till my Dad would get off work and then we'd drive all the way home, which I never wanted to do. Here at her house, I found a safe Haven. I felt as if when here, nothing could harm me or make me sad. This is the only house I've felt comfortable in and feel that I could call home. Later on when I got to Junior High and High school, I would still come there every morning and afternoon. She'd let me practice my music and wanted to know all about the things I was interested in. She began to buy me journals that I could write in wherever I went. She told me that I can do whatever I put my mind to as long as I continue to work hard and have a good attitude. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"> <span style="line-height: 20px;">My Junior year of high school, my Mammaw got in a terrible wreck. She was hit nearly head on by a large truck when she was on her way to visit her sister. The car was totaled and I was convinced she didn't survive. I remember praying so very hard for her to be healed. I prayed for more time that I could spend with her. That year was a very rough year for me in many ways. I'm so thankful that she survived the wreck and that I was able to spend another five years with her. Her head was hit pretty bad and she was never quite the same after her wreck. She's always been a tad forgetful as I grew up. After the wreck, her dementia increased and her mind began to loose a lot of memory. Words can't describe how much it hurt to look into her eyes when she realized she couldn't remember basic things. She truly hated forgetting and always wished she could recall things. From then on I made it a point to always try my best to help her. </span></span><br />
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<span style="line-height: 20px;">I decided to move in with her at her house towards the end of my senior year of high school. I felt as if she needed someone to help take care of her. She could no longer drive nor remember how to cook. All the special memories I had of growing up with her was then to be acted out again in return. I would then study the guide channel and record her favorite shows as they came on. I'd prepare our meals and take her to the beauty shop and let her stay as long as she wanted in order to see and talk to everyone. I'd take her to Cracker Barrel or Grandy's after big doctor visits to cheer her up. Sometimes I'd bring her to the mall to see where I worked and I could fix her ice cream. I'd bring her treats and sweets for her to enjoy throughout the day. We'd still color in coloring books. I'd write things for her to read. On occasions I'd still crawl into her bed, watch t.v. and talk with her till we both fell asleep. Nothing brought me greater joy than to see her face light up when I'd come home. She would stay up at night till I'd come home just so she could tell me good night and that she loved me. During my freshman year of college I became more busy which made the balancing of both school and being a primary caregiver difficult. It definitely stretched me in many ways all of which I know God was able to use me. The summer before I moved out I traveled to Malawi, Africa. I let her help me pack and prepare to leave. When I returned, she wanted to see every picture and hear every story from my trip. The fall of that same year I had to make the tough decision to move. I chose to live on campus the next two years in order to focus more on school and work towards my music degree. It was getting to where she would need 24 hour care that I was not able to provide while being a full time college student. She told me she wanted me to get that degree so I could then go out and do great things. I moved out but continued to visit weekly if not daily. When I went to spend Christmas in South East Asia that following December, she wanted to know everything about the trip. She helped me pack all the scarves, gloves, hats, and socks that I would pass out to all the children I'd come in contact with while overseas. She loved seeing the pictures I took and hearing the stories I had to tell. She said she always knew I'd be a traveler and would get to see the world one day. </span></span><br />
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<span style="line-height: 20px;"><b> The End of the Journey</b></span></span><br />
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<span style="line-height: 20px;">February of 2012 my Mammaw was put into the nursing home. I continued to visit her as much as possible. Though it wasn't the same as her house, we were able to share some sweet times together there watching t.v. shows, coloring, and eating treats I'd bring. I'd decorate her room as much as I could just to see her face light up. You can't help but be happy when you see that woman smile. Though this past year was very rough tough each visit, I don't regret a single minute of it. We knew each other so well, we talked the same, ate the same, and even sometimes looked same. We could finish each other's sentences and know exactly what the other was thinking. We had the same type of humor and always picked on each other. She was always a big flirt and had the men at the tip of her fingertips. Guys at the nursing home would flirt with her and she'd always play hard to get. She was always very protective of me and gave guys that wanted to take me out on dates a hard time. She was very defensive towards every guy except one. The first time my Mammaw met Westley Wallace, she immediately fell in love with him, who could blame her. She began smiling real big and and flirting with him which was hilarious. I always told her that she couldn't steal my man though. She loved it when Westley an I both came to visit her so much that it was all she talked about when we were away. She bragged about me like no other. No one could ever make me feel so confident and brave like she could. She always had words of encouragement and affirmation. She has saved every card I have given her along with ones she has received from others. She also saved every newspaper clipping of my performances and awards. I've also saved everything she has given me which I'm so thankful for now. Living here in this house has been interesting. I moved back in this past May with it now being my very own house. Having your very own house at the age of 21 is a pretty big deal in my eyes. Aside from some decorations and a few modifications, this house is still the same, all the beautiful furniture is still here and being preserved. I will always have a love for this house and neighborhood that means so much to me. Keeping this house up for the time being is the least I could do in the honor of my Mammaw. She raised her three sons in this house. She loved this house and living here and so do I. Loosing her was very hard, yet at the same time I have been preparing for this for a long time. God has gradually helped me over these past few years to let go in a sense when it was needed. I know she is no longer hurting physically. Also her mind is no longer forgetful which brings me great joy to realize. It's weird not getting to take care of her anymore. It's weird driving by the nursing home and not being able to stop by to visit. It's weird being bored out of my mind during the break and not going to the store to get goodies and decorations for her room. I miss the little things. I am beyond thankful for the years of memories I got to share with her. I've never cared for someone so much in my life. In James 1:27 God calls us to take care of the orphans and the widows. I can't think of any better way I could have done this than to have taken care of my Mammaw. There's something about washing an old lady's feet and painting her nails that's very humbling. It was so cool to show love to orphans in other countries in similar ways that I was able to show love to my Mammaw. I certainly plan to continue traveling and serving in places overseas. For a while now I've felt God calling me to possibly go into music therapy as a future career. After the passing of my Mammaw I feel that calling to be even stronger. Sometime after I graduate with a Bachelor's degree in Music Education, I plan to become a certified music therapist. Then I can take care of more old people and orphans and show love to many others who need it all through the art of music. </span></span><br />
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<span style="line-height: 20px;">Though I miss my Mammaw so very much, I couldn't think of any better time for her passing. God truly works everything out for the good of those who love Him, Romans 8:28. She is no longer hurting and unresponsive in a hospital bed. She is no longer forgetting who she is. She is no longer suffering but rejoicing in heaven where there are probably more sweets than she could ever imagine. This woman was so so so sooooo precious and sweet. Her smile was beautiful and her features were gorgeous. Though there has been some mourning following her death, there is even more of a celebration for the amazing life she lived out loving both God and people. </span></span><br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-43091565107822520132012-08-06T12:49:00.003-05:002015-10-06T18:07:48.463-05:00Forgive and Don't Forget<div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; orphans: 2; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">I used to cringe when I'd hear the word Forgiveness. It used to seem so impossible. So many times I'd think once you forgive those who've wronged you, the war is over and nothing else would ever go wrong much less you'd be wronged again. The first seventeen years of my life were truly a living Hell. A life of constant doubt, fear, physical pain, emotional pain, and depression. All due to people who have let me down over and over and over and over again...talk about some anger issues, oh boy did I have some. That's when I began playing drums. What better way to get out frustration than to hit stuff all the time and make music in the midst of it all? Needless to say music has always been how I can cope with the chaos and confusion in my life. God Delivered me from much hopelessness, heartache, anger, sadness, hurting, and the list could seriously go on for days and days. Never pray "God may Your will be done, whatever the cost." if you don't truly mean it with EVERYTHING that you are. It wasn't until I gave God my Everything that He became my Everything. My God answers prayers. He has called me to do some of the craziest things imagined and continues. I was called to forgive those who've wronged me. Not just those who've wronged me, but those who wished I were dead and spit in my face. As crazy and ridiculous as this thought process was to me in the beginning....I came across many verses that assured me I was not alone. Never have been and Never will be. Above all Jesus knows exactly how I feel. He not only has seen the hurt I've experienced in my life, but He has walked through it and endured far worse than I could ever fathom. If that were'nt crazy enough, He FORGAVE Everyone who denied,abused,disowned,misused, mocked,accused, and hurt Him. WOW. Talk about something to humble you when you think your situation is the worst ever. Not to belittle what I've grown up in, believe me...it freakin sucked, but when compared to what God promises to do with a life of pain...this trial is to be faced with joy. That doesn't mean I always have a smile on my face 24/7 or never shed a tear late in the night...it means that above all God is Always a God of Provision and Protection. The least I could do is forgive others as He has forgiven me.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br />I've found that forgiveness is just the first step of the healing process. I first had to truly forgive people who've hurt me four years ago. Just that moment within itself is something I'll never forget. From then on God has healed my heart tremendously and has called me to serve in ministry as well. Oh the things He will do with a fully surrendered heart/life. I've been to other parts of the world and now addicted to serving Him anywhere and everywhere. I've been blessed to lead multiple disciple now weekends, lead worship in many different bands and churches, lead family groups at Cross Camp, and the list goes on. He has called me to Love. I never thought four years ago that He'd call me not just to love...but to "Love until it hurts,then Love More." This used to always keep me up at night thinking and telling God how I felt. "Love more? But wait I did my part....I loved by forgiving. That was a huge deal and took everything within me to do...I don't understand. What more could I possibly do?" The people I wanted nothing to do with anymore, the ones whom I wanted to move as far away from as possible, and those who've caused so many tears and stress....God has called me to continue to minister to them. I'm learning more and more how it's a daily process and something I can never do on my own. Only God in and through me can help me do what used to seem impossible.<br /><span style="font-weight: normal;">I would love to say that when you forgive someone that everything will immediately be sunshine a roses...but at least for me, not so much. There will however be some clouds removed and more beams of light shining through the darkness. The roses will begin to bud and show their potential. In order for those buds to grow, they need rain to water them. I personally hate rain. I'm short and have naturally curly hair, therefore rain and I have never been bff's. As much as I strongly dislike the rain, I know it's needed for my growth. My life has been flooded by rain but because of it God has molded me into something that can be used by Him in some crazy ways. I've come a Long....way these past four years, but there are still some scars being healed and wounds being sewn up. I still have to forgive. Bitterness is always a temptation. Trust issues want to get the best of me. God is Bigger than All of that and more. So as I continue to Love until it hurts, then Love More...there's a supernatural type of peace and comfort from God. He's there by my side when I'm up till 2am burdened and praying for those I've forgiven and that they will hopefully one day know Christ. He wipes away my tears. He gives me the strength to face all of my fears. He continues to bless me with such Godly friends, mother figures, and an amazing boyfriend. He Loves me and knows what's best for me. Though I don't fully understand why, He stills chooses to use me here and now in a very rough and tough situation. It's hard, but not impossible. He brings Beauty from Pain. So let it all out. Let Go. Give it to Him. Let Him carry that burden. Continue to allow Him to break your heart for what breaks His. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></span><span style="font-weight: normal;">As crazy as my life seems at times...I wouldn't have it any other way. </span><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIamAyxAZgiXEyw8dSy1NAVsWBFjimDbXdbRN1Eq1nQejt93zYS1PsbAxWXCgoz-fYaRiMuqxHbCik4Ol7D-ggRBLJuynGk_fBDd84PAT9F6tP4d-3JbfV7Z1XUyzTQ4yk5gY28tM859I/s1600/494.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIamAyxAZgiXEyw8dSy1NAVsWBFjimDbXdbRN1Eq1nQejt93zYS1PsbAxWXCgoz-fYaRiMuqxHbCik4Ol7D-ggRBLJuynGk_fBDd84PAT9F6tP4d-3JbfV7Z1XUyzTQ4yk5gY28tM859I/s320/494.JPG" width="320" /></a><span style="font-weight: normal;">I must forgive and NEVER forget what God has done, is doing, and will do.</span><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2Fwx14Ub_B1tgeOJcT9PzG6oe6Pf3c64MdkfUP9Ki8FgzAtRGLpsBbj2QmaYJ3jyPxkF7bfKtUvKxnDAyxjJqK3iVhJraOuJeouF7D-tvqs6XCLiHHtNgUdFyouxWsxadDYPRF1GoiIM/s1600/514.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2Fwx14Ub_B1tgeOJcT9PzG6oe6Pf3c64MdkfUP9Ki8FgzAtRGLpsBbj2QmaYJ3jyPxkF7bfKtUvKxnDAyxjJqK3iVhJraOuJeouF7D-tvqs6XCLiHHtNgUdFyouxWsxadDYPRF1GoiIM/s320/514.JPG" width="320" /></a></span></div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-2237307845714152282012-08-06T11:22:00.003-05:002012-08-14T08:42:15.115-05:00A PURE HEART Over this past month God has been rocking my face off. Conviction has taken place in areas of my life where I never thought much was wrong. Not only has conviction taken over, but also much movement. I always say that I can't sit still in a worship service, and that is 100% True. Anyone who knows me well enough can't deny the fact that God has done such a huge work in my life to which I can't help but dance,sing,smile,laugh, and praise Him for all that He has done,is doing, and will do in my life! I will admit though, a lot of times I'm more expressive and out there in worship depending on my surroundings. Who I'm worshiping next to, what songs we are singing, who's leading worship, and so on. God has really placed on my heart this past week to worship Him for Who He is. I'm realizing more and more how God calls me to worship Him anywhere and everywhere, anytime and all the time. No matter if it's in a traditional church setting, in my car driving, playing drums and practicing as a percussion major, being a leader at an event, teaching kids music, performing in front of a large crowd, speaking about what He has done in my life, or in a church with no roof in the middle of Africa.....my worship should never be contained and held back.<br />
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As I was growing up in my youth group a good friend of mine always talked of her "secret place." A sweet escape where you can go to while worshiping Jesus. A place where you can be fully focused on Him in all His wonder and majesty. A place full of beauty and an intimate time with God. A place of no distractions. When I thought of what that would be like for me, these images popped up in my mind instantly<br />
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Being barefoot on Lake Malawi in Africa watching the sun rise early in the morning...</div>
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having the crystal clear water wash my feet clean while being on the other side of the world<br />
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Looking at Huge Buddhist temples and being discouraged while looking to my left and seeing God's creations in all it's Beauty</div>
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My view while on the tip top of a mountain in SouthEast Asia<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHHjb6DQhn9GpjJr2JFVRxdRmvt2X4VHtIvJR1eXHa2L-Z6bDbedg5JNT0O3nobpX3DacUIus4k-aHcMM8XaHhzY3ib3sN81uuqtHH8WNWktxTbS7woqxuSTWHDatAC5FrqIx6vS_7qZU/s1600/092.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHHjb6DQhn9GpjJr2JFVRxdRmvt2X4VHtIvJR1eXHa2L-Z6bDbedg5JNT0O3nobpX3DacUIus4k-aHcMM8XaHhzY3ib3sN81uuqtHH8WNWktxTbS7woqxuSTWHDatAC5FrqIx6vS_7qZU/s320/092.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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Is it just me, or does that frozen water look like a tree? This is what I saw from the plane on the way to Asia. Breathtaking is an understatement.</div>
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one of the greatest times of worship I've ever experienced with God. My iPod, some David Crowder, my little pink highlighted bible, and His creation made known to me. Best Father daughter date EVER!</div>
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At least for me, when I look through these pictures and remember such amazing times of my life...I think to myself "How could I not worship God with Everything that I am!?" But I honestly can't tell you how many times my heart wants to grow apathetic and forget just how Great and Amazing my God truly is.......also the gazillion times I forget that worship is a daily thing. It's not just when you're standing in the church pews or attending an event where there is music played, it's also through your every day actions which are a reflection of your heart.</div>
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I'm so thankful for these breath taking experiences in my life. When I'm in a service where the music isn't what you'd typically see on my iPhone or the style is not my favorite, I have to stop, close my eyes, and allow myself to go to a place where it's just me and God. Where He comforts me and shows me His love for me. Where I can express how I feel towards my Savior, Provider, Protector, Healer, Redeemer, Friend, and the best Dad I could ever ask for. Oh my....How He sure does Love me unconditionally and selflessly! A lot of times I have different images in my head while closing my eyes to worship. Sometimes I see flashbacks of some major struggles in my life. I vividly see the scene played out where I'd be outside in the late hours of the night crying out and pleading to be rescued. Along with that I typically see several verses written throughout the book of Psalms which were highlighted during those times in the desert. Other times I'll picture one of the images I just shared. I remember it as if it were just yesterday and can feel God's embrace and become extremely humbled by His Sovereignty. Many times I go sit on the dock of the bayou on my college's campus, read my bible, listen to music, and talk with Jesus. This has always been a beautiful view and something you never get out of your head. Then there is one of my all time favorite places. When I can't be there physically to worship God, I can always use my photographic memory to feel as if I'm there. I see an empty stage,practice room, or even band room. These places have always been a safe Haven for me. A place where I feel invisible and confident as if nothing bad could ever harm me. I feel such a freedom and energy. These are the places where many dreams have been formed and continue to build up. These are these places I have already seen many dreams and goals come true. There's something about an empty stage that has always intrigued me. In the stillness and quiet, God's ways are made known to me and I hear Him speak through the silence. It's hard to even describe how awesome this feeling is that I get but needless to say it is one of the things that make me zealous for the things of the Lord! I love to spend time with Him in these places even if it's when I'm practicing or playing music simply for the joy it brings me.</div>
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I'm writing all of this to say that certain songs will get you more pumped up than others. Certain styles and genres may intrigue your ears more than most. Regardless of how you feel you can worship Him, don't hold back. Find a secret place. Run to Him and allow Him to hold you with a sweet embrace. Let Him wash your feet and cleanse you. Have Him wrap you in His Arms and not let go. Let Him consume you from the inside out. Cry out to Him and ask for a pure heart daily. He's waiting for you to draw near to Him, </div>
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He will draw near to you.</div>
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<i><b><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: x-small;">There is a God who loves me</span><br style="background-color: white; font-size: small;" /><span style="background-color: white; font-size: x-small;">Who wraps me in His arms</span><br style="background-color: white; font-size: small;" /><span style="background-color: white; font-size: x-small;">And that is the place where I'm changed</span><br style="background-color: white; font-size: small;" /><span style="background-color: white; font-size: x-small;">And that's where I belong</span><br style="background-color: white; font-size: small;" /><br style="background-color: white; font-size: small;" /><span style="background-color: white; font-size: x-small;">Take me to that place, Lord</span><br style="background-color: white; font-size: small;" /><span style="background-color: white; font-size: x-small;">To that secret place where</span><br style="background-color: white; font-size: small;" /><span style="background-color: white; font-size: x-small;">I can be with You</span><br style="background-color: white; font-size: small;" /><span style="background-color: white; font-size: x-small;">You can make me like You</span><br style="background-color: white; font-size: small;" /><span style="background-color: white; font-size: x-small;">Wrap me in Your arms</span></span></b></i></div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-35576012129519675592012-01-12T01:39:00.003-06:002015-10-06T16:18:17.395-05:00The Small ThingsLately I've been working on growing closer to God and bringing glory to Him in the small things. It's easy a lot of times to acknowledge the presence of God when you're at church but what about when you're back at home? What about when you're in line at the grocery store or caught in a traffic jam when late for school or work? What about when you're sitting at the doctors office for several hours waiting long past the scheduled appointment time? What about when you're having to stand behind the old lady at Walmart who takes her sweet little time checking out two buggies full of merchandise in the "20 items or less" lane? Gets a little hard then doesn't it? Then come to think of it...aren't those the situations Jesus saw as huge opportunities to show love to the unloved and compassion to the Ebeneezer Scrooges? Just think about John 4 and the Woman at the Well. I mean yeah He probably wasn't having to wait in line behind the annoying soccer mom who has a bunch of ankle bitters running around the store or had to deal with telemarketers calling His phone all the time...but never the less He still had to deal with rude people and everyday temptations. People spit on Him, beat Him, mocked Him, and in the end crucified Him. He still ministered to the scoffers and the thieves. He invited them to the table and provided for them. He cleaned the unclean and chose to hang out with tax collectors.<br />
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"So if there's any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, and affection and sympathy, complete my job by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his or her own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though He was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made Himself nothing, taking the form as a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, He humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted Him and bestowed on Him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father."<br />
-Philippians 2:1-11<br />
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Jesus did all of that and calls me to be more like Him each day. WOW. This is both a huge privilege and responsibility! Why not bring glory to God in the small things? Many times it's the small things that become Big. Have you ever had one of those terrible, horrible, no good, very bad days? We're talking where everything goes wrong...you woke up late and didn't have time to fix your monstrosity of a hairdo. You can't decide on what to wear and in a hurry so you accidentally wear a pair of shoes and sweater that totally break the infamous brown and black rule. You throw your books in your backpack and rush to beat the morning traffic. You show up late to class and find out that there's a pop quiz that started five minutes ago. You forgot to fix coffee and become drowsy and loose focus. You need a writing utensil then realize you have nothing on you but must take the test. Then out of no where a random classmate that you are barely acquainted with hands you their pencil....life saver huh? When you think of the things that changes lives; sitting by the nerd with a comb over, suspenders, braces, and fancy calculator at the lunch table isn't usually what first comes to mind does it? Much less asking the waitress working late at night in a restaurant how she is doing and really meaning it....Or telling a seven year old that she is loved. Or telling a student they make you proud. But it's those "small" things that God uses to change the world for His Kingdom. I was the nerd at the lunch table. I was the girl that was always working job after job and having the worst days imagined. I was the insecure band kid/drummer that was told she made her instructor proud. I was the seven year old that was told I was loved and not only that but by God Himself. Though I did not begin living my life for Christ till I was around age 11; being told that I was loved changed my life Forever. Heck it's one of the reasons I'm still alive right now. Telling a kid that they are loved when the last thing they've ever seen or heard is love growing up is like being told you just won one million dollars...but even better. Suddenly waiting in line behind old Gertrude with her 50 items that takes for ever to checkout doesn't seem like such a big deal. Then those everyday mishaps can turn into every day blessings. God has really been showing me a lot on how I can use my time and social skills for His glory and not my own. It's so easy to think you're too busy for ministry and even for God at times... but you aren't. It's the small things that are huge to God, the every day things you do. Those situations and circumstances were placed there in your life for a reason. See the door God has opened and walk through it without the blindfold on. He wants to use you to edify the Kingdom. He wants to use you at work, school, home, walmart, target, chevron, and even the doctor's offices. You never know what awesome things Jesus has up His sleeves for you to do.<br />
So "Go hard or go home."<br />
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Seeking Jesus, walking humbly, and learning daily. </div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-7160160655129701682011-12-31T02:08:00.004-06:002015-10-06T16:03:39.509-05:00Shake It Out<div style="text-align: center;">
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I've been listening to one of my favorite artists Florence + The Machine lately and have fallen in love with the song "Shake it Out" off of the Ceremonials album.</div>
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Here's some of the lyrics:</div>
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Regrets collect like old friends</div>
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Here to relive your darkest moments
I can see no way</div>
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I can see no way
And all of the ghouls come out to play </div>
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And every demon wants his pound of flesh</div>
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But I like to keep some things to myself </div>
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I like to keep my issues strong</div>
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It's always darkest before the dawn</div>
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And I've been a fool and I've been blind</div>
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I can never leave the past behind </div>
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I can see no way,I can see no way </div>
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I'm always dragging that horse around</div>
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And our love is passed, it's such a mournful sound</div>
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Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground </div>
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So I like to keep my issues strong
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But it's always darkest before the dawn </div>
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Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out </div>
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Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out </div>
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And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back </div>
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So shake him off </div>
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I am done with my graceless heart </div>
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So tonight I'm gonna cut it out and then restart </div>
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Cause I like to keep my issues strong
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It's always darkest before the dawn </div>
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Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out </div>
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Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out </div>
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And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back </div>
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So shake him off </div>
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And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back</div>
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And given half the chance would I take any of it back</div>
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It's a final mess but it's left me so undone</div>
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It's always darkest before the dawn</div>
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I feel like this song is my anthem for the year of 2011. This year has been both Beautiful and Ugly. It has been a year of many adventures and many life lessons. During January of 2011 I was in South East Asia eating noodles everyday, speaking in a different foreign language, sharing the gospel, serving alongside some of the strongest men and women of God I've ever met, playing drums with street kids, falling in love with street kids, flying on a lot of planes, riding a lot of buses, and drinking a lot of hot tea. I also led worship and small groups for youth disciple nows and girls retreats almost every weekend during spring semester. I was playing drums in the ULM BCM Haven band which I loved oh so much. Ministry in my church Hope Alive thrived, grew, and increased my passion for both God and people. In April I decided to pursue one of my dreams and drove 24 hours to New York where I would wait in line several hours along with 600 others, be signed for a time slot, and audition for STOMP on Broadway. This was a dream come true itself. Though I didn't make it I still choose to Dream Big and live up to the saying "Go Hard or Go Home." This summer I was a leader for Cross Camp again and saw how God allowed me to go through such trials when growing up in order to minister to youth of all ages here and now. I got to spend time in Nashville, TN with my best friend Alyssa and began to fall in love with Music City and this pretty amazing music school named Belmont University. I was fortunate to be a bridesmaid in my friend MaeLee's wedding in Alabama on December 17,2011 exactly a year after spending some memorable days in serving in Asia together. I have learned to push myself even harder as a musician and student this year. I don't think I've ever practiced so long and hard until this past semester and it's finally starting to show which is incredibly</div>
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awesome. I began to become burnt out on ministry. I found myself doing so many different things constantly to which I never felt I was all there. I was so half way committed to everything that I think I was missing the real reason of why I was doing certain events in the first place. When I think of the year of 2011 I think of it being a Burn Out. A burn out on ministry. A burn out on school. A burn out on working. A burn out on socialization. A burn out on music. A burn out on everything pretty much. All my life I've seemed to always be on the go. I love it yet at the same time grow weary. For a while I've found myself neglecting God over all else. I'm still involved with the things of God and love God. But, somewhere along the way I lost sight of writing the word upon my heart and seeking God daily. I long for consistency and focus. I desire to grown more in my faith. I allowed myself to get caught in some sort of spiritual inertia and apathy which isn't cool. It's funny how sin can have such an effect on you. It doesn't matter if it was several years, months, weeks, days, or even minutes ago...Satan still uses your mistakes to taunt you and make you feel trashy and worthless.</div>
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"Regrets collect like old friends, here to relive your darkest moments.</div>
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All of the ghouls come out to play,every demon wants his pound of flesh.It's always darkest before the dawn."</div>
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This year I let the things I was once ashamed of consume me and beat me down. I let the devil convince me that I could not overcome. At the same time Jesus reminded me that I can do all things not on my own but with Him as my strength.</div>
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"And I've been a fool and I've been blind. I can never leave the past behind. I'm always dragging that horse around. Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground."</div>
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I love God. I love people. I love music. I love life. I love this New Year. A new year of more adventure and more excitement. A year of less constant activity and less burn out. A year of new beginnings and growth in faith. A year of ministering more to others and showing the love of Christ everywhere I Go. A new year to embrace and enjoy...to take what life gives me whether good or bad. A new year to cherish dreams that come true and to learn from the beautiful letdowns. </div>
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Goodbye 2011 and hello 2012.</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-88907940015825389832011-12-25T20:47:00.001-06:002015-10-06T15:32:04.393-05:00Christmas Time is Here.I've never been the sharpest tool in the shed much less one to understand a lot of the things life wants to throw at me. My mind is blown when trying to comprehend how Jesus came to this earth as an infant and was white as snow, He was perfect in every way. Not only that but He was placed in a manger, not some fancy decked out crib from Baby Depot. This is the same Jesus that had no place to lay His head (Luke 9:58). This is the same Jesus that was beaten and bruised and mistreated throughout His entire life. The same Jesus that would hang out with the lowest of the low and showed compassion to everyone He encountered. The same Jesus that died for me. It's difficult for me to understand such a crazy concept still to this day. That's because God will never fit in our little box of logic. He is Holy and so much Bigger. One thing I do know is that Jesus is the greatest thing that has ever entered into my life.<br />
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It's easy to say you won't get carried away this year during the Christmas season. That you won't buy as many gifts, wake up dreadfully early to get a big sale the day after Thanksgiving, worry if the tree isn't set up the way you like it, or let the idea of gifts consume you. But, do we truly choose not to cling to such things? I can tell you first hand that Christmas is certainly not all about getting gifts and spending lots of money and you fill in the blank_. Though all of that is good, fun, and lovely...if you didn't receive a single gift or have the finances to buy everyone and their mommas a present; would that ruin your day all together? Don't get me wrong that'd suck a whole lot and it's not the first thing that comes to mind when you think of having a "Holly Jolly Christmas," but never the less life will still go on. What if there were no presents under the tree? What if there was no tree at all? No "Holiday greetings and happy meetings"...? It might seem as if the world will come to an end at this point but it won't. I used to think so but time and time again I'm reminded that's not the case.<br />
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As I've sat here at my house alone for the majority of this Christmas day, I can't help but think a lot about a lot of things. I randomly decided to google the definition of "family."<br />
Of course, most of the definitions define family as "a group of people who are related by blood."<br />
However, there were a few definitions that said something different such as "a group of people who support each other and love one another." and so on.<br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><i>"In today’s society most people consider family to be just blood relations but in reality it is the bonds you share with those you care for the most. Family is a completely necessary part of anyone’s life. Your family helps you through the tough times and provides the needed support to get through life. Family cares about what happens to you, are always there for you, and above all, loves you. "</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 18px;">Mmmm....Can I get an Amen?!? This brought so much comfort to my heart. If it were strictly that of blood relations, I don't have much of a family at all the way I look at it. But if it's true that family is far more than that...well I have the largest family there is. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 18px;">Then I begin to think of what the phrase "blood related" means to me. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 18px;">Through the blood of Christ I belong to a family of believers all across the world. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 18px;">Many I've already had the blessing of meeting and many I will meet one day. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 18px;">I often say that "Music is within my blood." If so, I know of many who can relate that are considered to be family as well.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 18px;">I would be foolish to ever say I don't have a family, because I most certainly do. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 18px;">What I consider to be family may not be your common definition found in wikipedia, but I care the most about a lot of folks and I come to find that a lot of folks care about me. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 18px;">I may not join family during the holidays but I know they are there for me. When I need support I can find it. When I need encouragement and affirmation, it can be a text away. Though certain situations can make me feel unloved, I know deep down I am loved and God is to be glorified rather than circumstances. </span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 18px;">Above all it is Christ Who strengthens me. To have a loving Family on top of that, what better gift could you possibly ask for during Christmas time? </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 18px;">Though things never seem to go as planned and though being alone while everyone else is celebrating can be a bummer...I am thankful for this special day the Lord has made. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 18px;">I'm thankful for time to sit still, relax, and REST. True Rest in the Lord is like no other. I'm thankful for time to reflect and take Joy in the God of my salvation. I'm thankful for those who sacrifice their traditional family settings to include a kid who has no place to go. I'm thankful for turkey and some burnt pecan pie. I'm thankful for coffee and a delectable Christmas tree cake. I'm thankful for those serving all across the country right now as I type. I'm thankful for the amazing time spent in Asia this time last year. Oh how I miss it so and wish I were there again at this very moment. I'm thankful for my Mammaw and another year I could spend with her cute lil ole self. I'm thankful for Everything God has chosen to bestow and bless me with. I am thankful for what the word "family" looks like in my life.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">It all goes back to Christ in the end. The birth, crucifixion and resurrection of Jesus will forever be the greatest gift there ever was, is, and will be. Because He came to die for the sins of man, Jesus is the Reason for the Season. Jesus is the reason I'm still alive today and can live life abundantly. It's my responsibility to be reminded of that. </span></span><span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 18px;">Though it may not seem to be "traditional" or provide that "home sweet home" kind of feeling, this day is to be cherished and that is something I am certain of. While I was in Asia, my teammates and I were told that we would never look at Christmas the same way again once we return to the states. I don't think I've ever found a statement to be so true before. I've discovered that I am my happiest when I am able to serve others. After serving in other countries to the fullest, especially during Christmas, it's easy to return home and feel as if I'm never truly serving others unless I'm on a trip far away. But after staying in town this December I see more and more how God calls me to go and serve everywhere. Even in Monroe, LA of all places. </span><span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 18px;">So though it's not a hard task to loose site of the true meaning of Christmas, </span><span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; line-height: 18px;">I think I'm finally beginning to see what it's all about. </span></div>
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<span style="color: #111111; font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">MERRY CHRISTMAS, Here's to Many More.</span></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-32353322779979279312011-02-05T01:52:00.007-06:002015-10-06T15:16:05.409-05:00One Thing Remains<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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There are so many things I struggle with finding clarity over. Then I discover how my constant worries are but dust when compared to what the word tells me. The things of this world will NOT last forever. Neither will circumstances whether good or bad. One thing remains and that's the Lord.<br />
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He offers a beautiful word called GRACE. Grace in which I do not have to perform work after work just to have the hope of receiving eternal life in heaven. God has forgiven my sins. He constantly forgives me for the ways I fall short. Through Jesus Christ, there is a way to be one with God again. I, a human, can never change fully on my own strength. I am a sinner to the core, rotten since birth. I was born a sinner, I once was enslaved to sin, and because of that sin I was destined for a place called Hell. "For the punishment for sin is Death." So after crying out for forgiveness and admitting I do not have it all together... I decided then and there to Follow Christ, to take up my cross and deny myself. I decided to live my life fully devoted to Him. This is how I know that I know that I know I will one day see my God face to face and rejoice with other brothers and sisters in a heavenly dwelling. Oh what a Glorious day that shall be! For I have the "Lamb over Me."<br />
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Without Christ, I am nothing. Christ + nothing= EVERYTHING. If it wasn't for Christ I would not be alive today, for that I am certain. I am also certain that Jesus Christ is the Way, the Truth, and the Life and no one else. No statue, great emperor, earthly king, ritual, practice, president, famous football player, celebrity, warrior, magician, god, or idol is above Christ. Only through Christ can you receive salvation. I am certain that Jesus came to die for me. Though it still blows my mind as to why, I know He did. He didn't just die so I could have life, but He died for me to Live life. A life that is dedicated to the One who created it. A life that glorifies and edifies the Kingdom. A life that reflects Christ.<br />
I know for certain that there is great power in the gospel. I know that the same God that healed the sick, made the lame walk, and the blind see is the same God we pray to today. He is more than capable of doing the same acts if not above and beyond. It's just a matter of Faith and Trust in Him.<br />
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I know that a life in Christ gives me hope, strength, energy, zeal, love, passion, and so sooo much Joy.<br />
I know that God wants to use me despite how I feel. He plans to use the life of someone who didn't care for life. God makes Beauty from the ashes. He is a Father to the Fatherless. He is LOVE.<br />
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Suddenly the uncertainties of this world grow strangely dim...<br />
There is no longer a huge concern on how much my future income will be, what my career will entitle, or even where I will live one day. It is so easy to cling to the past. It is even easier to cling to the future. What I struggle with is the here and now. Serving Him in the small things is a challenge. Being content with where I am at such a time as this will be a process. To be confident in what God has for me to do in my community will take some molding of the clay. Being able to see what serving looks like in local organizations, on campus, and through the church will call for vision. I find it sad that sometimes there is so much focus on what is to come that the present is ignored away and missed. What is current is being written on a dry erase board only to be erased, leaving the heart dry and lifeless. I don't want to miss it. I want to be all there. I want to be all here. I want to see Jesus use me. I want to see Jesus use others. I want to see others see who Jesus is and follow Him. Who says that is only for the future? Who says that can't happen now?<br />
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Hungering and Thirsting for more.<br />
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"All Consuming Fire, You're Our Hearts Desire. Living flame of Love, Come baptize us! Come baptize us!"Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-42767819349022500262011-01-12T02:35:00.003-06:002015-10-06T11:32:43.688-05:00KleptosThere are a lot of things that easily capture my heart and make it melt. Kids are definitely one of those things. I never pictured myself to fall in love with kids as much as I have. I never expected to become burdened beyond words for the orphaned, abandoned, abused, and oppressed. I just want to go back in time and prevent so much pain, suffering, and heartache from happening to such precious children. I can't help but become restless...<br />
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So many kids without homes. So many kids begging. So many kids with only one outfit. So many kids with no shoes. So many kids without parents. So many kids without anyone who has cared for them. So many kids alone. So many kids afraid. So many kids left for dead. So many kids aborted.<br />
So many kids who've survived abortion but are now disabled for life. So many kids...so many faces...so many who need Love. So many who don't even know what Love really is. Though in the flesh I just wish I could simply punch all those who've hurt them in the face...with the attitude of Christ I know I must love the abusers as well. That's where things get hard. It comes to a point that I no longer even think nor care about what has happened to me. How I've been hurt, mistreated, and abused...but what others must endure. The funny thing is, I've specifically prayed for God to break my heart for the afflicted and oppressed. I can never say God does not answer prayers. I can't find it in me to just sit back and watch such injustice to go on. Though I have no clue how to make a difference I'm trusting God knows. I just want to be found obedient to what He is calling me to do and how He is calling me to play a role within the work of the Kingdom.<br />
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Meet my sweet little friend. I met her exactly two weeks ago at a street kids home. She is 12...in a five year old's body basically. Her smile is contagious. Her laugh is to die for. Her eyes draw you near and her hands can paint a beautiful masterpiece.<br />
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She was most likely born disabled and considered worthless. She was told she could not be cared for. and was thrown out on the streets. Found by some amazing people who took her to the street home, she can come and go as she pleases. Words can't describe the kind of joy I found in seeing her smile, making her laugh, and playing games with her. My heart exploded when she started hitting my drum and we began playing back and forth. We just enjoyed life together. It was as simple and blissful as ever. We immediately became besties =)</div>
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She was handicapped and had trouble walking so she'd stand watching all of us playing with the other kids and running around. The littlest things would cause her to become so happy and joyful. She was the oldest in the group and practically took care of all the others. One minute she'd be playing then as soon as one of the boys ran up and messed with her she'd set them straight, haha! It was very entertaining even though it was all in Chinese and I could barely understand a word. =)</div>
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One of the most precious little girls I've ever met. It may seem crazy for me to have fallen in love with a kid I only spent a day with...but that little klepto stole about my heart that day. If I could have adopted her that day and was not still in college I would have in a heartbeat. A day hasn't gone by that I haven't thought about this sweet girl and prayed that God would take care of her, bless her, and show her more of what it's like to be Loved unconditionally. I see so much potential in her. Her heart is unique. Her actions are rare to find for her age. She will always hold a special place in my heart.</div>
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Then there's MenYaun. (Pretty sure that's spelled totally wrong but it's whatever.)</div>
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He was certainly a little adventurer. He decided to run away soon after meeting him. My heart broke for him. I pray God will have His hand on MenYaun's life. What joy it'd bring me to picture these kids growing up and knowing the Lord personally.<br />
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Then there's the girl who I can't seem to forget. God has placed this kid on my heart like crazy. I don't know her name. I don't know what she's been through. I don't know the ways she's been hurt. But it was so clear she has had pain from being mistreated.<br />
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There are no words...the few I have can't do how I feel any justice. I don't think I've ever felt such a burden for people/children...until I saw this girl. There is where loving the orphaned became difficult. She screamed and ran away anytime you'd come near her. It was said that she possessed. May the Most High God, Shang Di, reveal Himself to these children. My heart's desire is that they will know God and experience the Father's love. I'm currently praying for clarity in what I'm to do. My heart has been stolen by a lot of little kleptos for the past few weeks.<br />
I am forever changed and humbled by this adventure.<br />
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Being half way around the pushing through cold weather, eating with chopsticks, playing games and songs, loving on kids who've been ignored, and sharing life/Jesus with others is what made this year the Best Christmas and New Years EVER. God is so Good.</div>
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"Stoop down and reached those who are oppressed.Share their burdens and complete Christ's law."<br />
-Galatians 6:2<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-34004137538199722012011-01-09T17:22:00.008-06:002015-10-06T11:10:02.961-05:00Brain Explosion<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Since I've returned I've had all the feels.<br />
Comfort is a dangerous thing to mess with when other's lives are suffering. Comfort is why many have never heard of Jesus Christ. Comfort is why many kids are ignored and mistreated and left alone. Comfort is sometimes why others go without food and water just a few plane flights away. Comfort is what encourages an apathetic heart and lethargic body in a recliner over no showers, wearing the same clothes over, and sleeping in a hut.<br />
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"God does not care about your own personal comfort and will sometimes allow persecution in order that His will may be done."<br />
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I cannot get this statement out of my mind. We have no idea what persecution is. But I pray someday I may be blessed enough to see what it truly is. I pray one day I can share in the suffering of Christ. I pray one day America may have persecution...So the church may finally begin to disperse and go out instead of stay in a building forever.<br />
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After seeing people worshiping idols larger than my room I began to become so broken.<br />
Broken over the fact that they've never heard of someone who is Greater and far more worthy of praise, offerings, and sacrifice.<br />
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Many would probably see worshiping statues in other places as crazy and foolish and weird. But America has idols as well. They just don't have fancy temples, paintings, and incense burnt.<br />
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Instead, it's face paint, big screen t.v.'s, and huge stadiums.<br />
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American idols are sometimes on paper such as lottery tickets. The more money spent and possessions sacrificed, the more potential blessings and success..right? America's idols are on the billboards and news feeds. They're in the magazines and morning paper. The same God that told people in the old testament to stop bowing down to idols is the same God you pray to in the churches today. His commandment still holds true. He deserves far more than simply what makes us happy, succeed, and look good.....what makes us comfortable...</div>
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That is something I find heartbreaking. The fact that comfort has crippled the place I live in.<br />
Despite the fact that the gospel is at the tips of our fingers, we can freely worship God as we please, there are enough bibles for everyone to own at least 2, and we have far more than anything we could ever possibly need.</div>
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I want to make Jesus known among the Nations. Though I long to be in other parts of the world at this time I know it's for me to shine a light here and now. As a 19 year old single college student who for some reason God has chosen to use in Monroe, LA. So though my heart craves for what's to come, it is also comforted in knowing there's work to still be done in my own community. May God be glorified and recieve what He deserves. To the ends of the earth may His name be shouted on the mountain tops.</div>
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I am SECOND.</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-30466551548307735062011-01-05T20:58:00.001-06:002015-10-06T10:25:48.117-05:00Spiritual Warfare<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I never quite understood what spiritual warfare was and looked like until I went to serve in SOuthEast Asia this year. In training I heard I would soon encounter it. That you could immediately feel the tension in the air and it would be so thick you could cut it with a knife...That as soon I would get out of the plane I would know there was a war going on. A war between what is Righteous and what is wicked. A war between pureness and unclean lips. A war between the spirit and the flesh. A war between what I believe in so dearly and what the world believes. I know God is real. I'd be foolish to deny the power, provision, strength, protection, wisdom, and sovereignty of God after I've seen countless ways of how He works. I now know that satan is very real also. He's drinking lots of coffee, staying awake to ace his tests. He studies your every move and plans every way possible to try and stop God from working through you. He's not worried about those who have not accepted Christ...they're already wrapped around his fingers. Those who believe in Jesus and radically follow Him are his target. As if he suddenly forgets that he has are been defeated and the true battle was already won on the cross...<br />
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So after being informed that I would encounter spiritual warfare in the near future I began to pray more intentionally for strength to fight against it. Throughout this past month my team and I have seen God do some pretty insanely awesome things. Both in us and through us as well as other believers. We have also seen Satan at work. We've seen him stirring up our wants, tricking us into thinking that a lot of our wants were needs. He tried to cause simple frustrations to erupt into volcanoes. He was trying everything possible to have doubt, fear, and selfishness creep into our hearts. Satan knows your weakness and knows how to make you at your most vulnerable state of mind. He knows how to make you insecure and timid. That's why it is so important to renew the mind daily especially when traveling to foreign lands out of typical comfort zones.<br />
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"For God has not given us the spirit of Timidity, but of power Love,and self-discipline. So Never be afraid to tell others about the Lord." -2 Timothy 1:7<br />
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What a blessing it is that The Most High God, Shang Di, is Above All and created all.<br />
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"We are indestructable until God says so."<br />
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How many times are you doing work in the harvest and when it starts to rain, you go back inside where it's dry...? How many times do you run in the fire then peace out when it begins to get really hot...? How many times do you go and go and go but one negative opinion causes you to completely shut down...? How many times is it dark outside and you don't even realize you have a flashlight in your backpack...? How many times do you see God working but as soon as you are uncomfortable you want to go home...?<br />
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I'm not saying these things out of condemnation, but out of love. Most of the time that's the way Satan works. Things go good, heck things go great! Then all of a sudden tension builds, the waters rise, and Satan starts the battle within a fortress of the mind that he loves to dwell in.<br />
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During the greatest of opportunities to share Christ with others...Satan is running a marathon. What a blessing it is to have discernment, to know and realize when Satan is at work. Praise God for the understanding that it's not simply ironic when you feel like quitting and giving up. Satan wants culture shock to get the best of you. It's one of the greatest mind games ever. It says in the word that even your heart can be deceitful. This means we must place our trust, hope, and complete faith in Christ because on our own we are weak.<br />
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Spiritual Warfare is real. It's everywhere and it's a constant battle. It's important to seek God's guidance in fighting against fleshly desires. REST is essential and the armor has to be put on daily as well as time spent in the war room/secret place.<br />
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Don't buy into the lies. Don't allow yourself to stop serving the Lord. Don't back out when you feel led and called to Go. Never turn down an opportunity to share the gospel with others.<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-49509686706030571762010-12-15T00:11:00.002-06:002015-10-06T10:07:44.958-05:00Adventure AwaitsSo after taking seven finals last week and having seven days until leaving I've been thinking a lot about school, careers, my future, past, relationships, money, and what it means to follow Christ sincerely. To follow Christ sincerely is to put Him first above all else. I must put Him above school, re-taking classes, student loans, homework, practicing, socializing, working, money...Above everything that gets in the way. It wasn't until I gave God everything that He became my everything.<br />
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Jesus lived a life of sacrifice. Therefore, the life of a Christian can't go without a sacrifice of some sort. In order to ensure you make a good grade on a test at times you must sacrifice something, right?Sleep, social interaction, your favorite t.v.show... Why do we sometimes act like Jesus doesn't call us to make a sacrifice? Instead we act as if we've been called to the exact opposite. We act as if we've been called to comfort, apathy, and selfishness. But the more I read the word the more I see scripture after scripture of how Jesus was beat, bloodied up, mocked, abused, denied, tempted, ridiculed, and crucified. I can't help but think of 1 Peter 4:12. Satan will tempt you, attack you, and he's constantly out to destroy you. But God is not Satan and He loves you like crazy. So why not Go and serve Him by serving others? Why not sacrifice a summer, winter, semester, year, money, shifts at work, people's opinions of you, and holidays? It's because of God that blessings exist in the first place. "Praise God to Who ALL Blessings flow." Every good and perfect gift comes from God. I deserve Hell and nothing more. But He has offered mercy and amazing grace! I'm leaving out of the country again in two days and I literally cannot contain my excitement!<br />
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THANK YOU to all who've given so generously and willingly. I praise Jesus for each of you whether acquaintance, dear friend, or complete stranger. Thank you for your prayers, support, encouragement and affirmation. I pray God will bless you mightily and know that He is already using you by sending me to share the love of Christ to others around the world who'd most likely never hear of Christ otherwise. Unless someone goes out to their community, city, town, village, hut...cardboard box...how will they hear? I am completely blown away by the provision of God especially financially. God is a God of provision and protection, forever and always. I'm so ready for the adventure the Lord and I are about to embark on! To the ends of the Earth!<br />
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"God bring me closer to You on this trip whatever it takes!"Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-3491950514648189562010-12-12T00:12:00.002-06:002015-11-10T01:10:06.834-06:00Sleepless in Monroe<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Once again I find myself unable to sleep.<br />
Such a strong burden for this lost and dying world...<br />
There are so many things I just don't understand.<br />
Why? Why? Why?<br />
<br />
Why do people have no shoes?<br />
<br />
Why do we have a more than enough shoes?<br />
<br />
Why are kids sleeping on the streets?<br />
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Why are kids abandoned?<br />
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Why are women degraded?<br />
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Why is money such an idol?<br />
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Why are people starving?<br />
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Why are people dieng from curable diseases?<br />
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Why am I the one blessed to live in America?<br />
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Why is there no persecution in the United States?<br />
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Why do people stay silent on what needs to be voiced?<br />
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Why is talk of freedom so hush-hush?<br />
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Why have people never heard of Christ?<br />
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Why are fellowships more popular than sharing the freakin gospel?<br />
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Why is offense glorified more than the lamb who was silent to the slaughter?<br />
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Why are the words out of mouths destroying relationships instead of encouraging others?<br />
-Ephesians 4:29<br />
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I often find myself asking so many questions that seem to remain unanswered. "If only I could find solutions for these issues, maybe this unsettledness would go away..." The truth is, I don't have to have all the answers. I could sit around all day and think of logical ways to make a difference. But that's the thing, God doesn't fit in a box of logic. He is Holy and just. The enemy likes to make you feel insignificant to the Kingdom. He can use rocks to praise Him, how much more could He use His beloved workmanships? He is Bigger and He will be glorified.<br />
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I care for those who are hurting far more than comfort. I'm starting to hurt with them instead of simply for them. My brain wants to explode when I think of the beautiful people I have encountered and shared life with and those I will soon encounter that are suffering so much while I have everything I could ever possibly need. I long to see the world radically changed for His Kingdom. I want to show hope, love, joy, peace, and true faith to others. Not because I'm a big deal but because Jesus is the Big Deal. I want to make His praise glorious to the ends of the earth and see the healing power that's in the name of Jesus break every chain. I dream of people of all nations crying out "Abba, Father." -experiencing His Love and never being the same again.<br />
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So as I sit here all worked up, burdened, frustrated, heartbroken, and full of passion...I become more confident in the mission at hand. Where the enemy wants the consumption of feeling overwhelmed to try and reach the masses, Jesus reminds us that He's for the one. Where we feel defeated, the finished work of the cross testifies to the battle that's already been won. I'm still going to praise Him and declare His promises in the midst of burdens, casting it all to the One who carries them. </div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #23221f; font-size: 16px; line-height: 21px; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #20124d; font-family: inherit;">"Cast your burden upon the LORD and He will sustain you; He will never allow the righteous to be shaken." -Psalm 55:22</span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #23221f; font-size: 16px; line-height: 21px; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #20124d; font-family: inherit;">"Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest." -Matthew 11:28</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #20124d; font-family: inherit;"><span class="text Rom-8-26" id="en-NIV-28143" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px; text-align: start;"><span class="versenum" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"> "</span>In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit<span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-28143A" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-28143A" title="See cross-reference A">A</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.625em; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span> himself intercedes for us<span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-28143B" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-28143B" title="See cross-reference B">B</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.625em; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span> through wordless groans.</span><span class="text Rom-8-27" id="en-NIV-28144" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px; text-align: start;"><span class="versenum" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 12px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"> </span>And He who searches our hearts<span style="font-size: 0.625em;"><span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-28144C" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-28144C" title="See cross-reference C">C</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.625em; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span></span> knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes<span style="font-size: 0.625em;"><span class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-28144D" data-link="(<a href="#cen-NIV-28144D" title="See cross-reference D">D</a>)" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.625em; line-height: 22px; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: top;"></span></span> for God’s people in accordance with the will of God." -Romans 8:26-27</span></span><br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-37026663179035879742010-12-10T00:11:00.001-06:002015-10-06T09:43:12.520-05:00God Is BIGGERGod is BIGGER than learning disabilities.<br />
God is BIGGER than divorce.<br />
God is BIGGER than drug addictions.<br />
God is Bigger than the destruction of alcohol.<br />
God is Bigger than 20 hours of school in one semester.<br />
God is Bigger than abuse.<br />
God is Bigger than the process of recovery from abuse.<br />
God is Bigger than depression.<br />
God is Bigger than eating disorders.<br />
God is Bigger than Cancer.<br />
God is Bigger than Malaria and Aids.<br />
God is Bigger than life and death.<br />
God is Bigger than student loans.<br />
God is Bigger than money.<br />
God is Bigger than my understanding of how big God is.<br />
God is Bigger than $3,000 being raised in less than a month for a mission trip.<br />
God is Bigger than persecution.<br />
God is Bigger than temptations.<br />
God is Bigger than relationships.<br />
God is Bigger than those who you look up to.<br />
God is Bigger than those whov'e let you down.<br />
God is BIGGER than a hectic schedule.<br />
God is Bigger than social life.<br />
God is Bigger than apathy.<br />
God is Bigger than injustice.<br />
God is BIGGER than college, pass or fail.<br />
God is Bigger than grad school.<br />
God is Bigger than you and me.<br />
God is Bigger than dreams.<br />
GOD IS BIGGER.<br />
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Sometimes, okay scratch that, most of the time I tend to forget that God is BIGGER than the events I hold so vitally important and major in my life. It's good to know God is even Bigger than that. Sometimes you just have to have faith in the fact that God is Bigger. He can be way over my head at times but then so close as to uphold me with His victorious right hand! -Isaiah 41:10. It blows my mind and at the same time comforts my heart to know God is bigger than what I stress and worry about, even the things I try to beat myself up for. God is Bigger and promises to take care of His children. So take heart, dear friends, situations and circumstances may seem Big, but He is Bigger! Allow Him to take control. He is more than capable of taking care of us. Cling to Christ tighter than your degree plans and transcripts. Christ deserves our Everything. Not 23%, 55%, or even 99% of us. He wants it ALL. He paid it ALL. He is BIGGER.<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-16467824966651419872010-11-02T12:21:00.003-05:002015-10-06T15:53:34.186-05:00Abba, I Belong to You<div style="text-align: center;">
He Heals the Broken hearted<br />
and binds their wounds</div>
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He is Love</div>
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He finds those forgotten</div>
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those who've been abused</div>
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He is Love</div>
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He knows your name</div>
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A Father to the Fatherless</div>
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A Healer of the Brokeness </div>
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You make Beauty from the ashes</div>
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A Helper to the helpless</div>
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A fighter for the hopeless</div>
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You Love those who are alone</div>
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He comforts the lonely</div>
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and hears their cry</div>
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He is Love</div>
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He holds the children throughout the night</div>
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He is Love</div>
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He knows your name</div>
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Give us Your heart Lord</div>
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Help us Love the unseen</div>
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Give us Your eyes Lord</div>
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Help us Love those in need</div>
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My God Heals. He Protects. He Provides. He Delivers. He Comforts. He Helps. He Always LOVES. He fights for us, not against us (Exodus 14:14)! He is jealous for us! He promises to take care of His sheep! How can we ever sit still in a worship service and not praise God for all He has done, is doing, and will do? Without Christ there is No hope. He is the reason I live. He is the reason I'm still alive. He is my Everything. I can't help but share this love to others. I would be extremely selfish and arrogant if I just kept it all to myself. I have the Best Dad in the world! A Dad that is proud of me. A Dad that holds me. A Dad that heals me. A Dad that changes me. A Dad who strengthens me. A Dad who encourages me. A Dad who moves me. A Dad who uses me. I am in awe.<br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: proxnov-reg, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 16px; text-align: left;">What manner of love</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: proxnov-reg, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 16px; text-align: left;"> that You would call us sons and daughters</span></div>
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: proxnov-reg, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 16px; text-align: left;"> We cry Abba, Father</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: proxnov-reg, arial, sans-serif; line-height: 16px; text-align: left;"> </span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-50637053346150843052010-09-03T17:21:00.004-05:002015-10-06T15:50:18.689-05:00DEEPERI've been wading in shallow waters<br />
You're the Ocean I am after<br />
I wanna Go<br />
I wanna Go with You<br />
Break the silence with Your whisper<br />
Take my hand and pull me under<br />
Cause I wanna Go with You<br />
So take me DEEPER to where You are that I may find You<br />
Take me further than where I've been<br />
I wanna be with You<br />
Set a way for what my eyes see<br />
Help me believe<br />
Help me break free<br />
Cause I wanna Go with You<br />
Take me through the Desert places for the chance to see Your face<br />
Take me past the breaking waves into the depth of Your embrace<br />
<br />
School has begun. Dun dun duh....! I want to succeed as a musician in the music program and be a better student in school. However, I aslo want to have a social life and serve Christ to the fullest. I realize I must find the balance all while putting god first above all things.<br />
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"Be humble,thinking of others as better than yourself. Don't think only of your own affairs but be interested in others too, what they're doing. Your attitude should be the same as Christ."<br />
-Philippians 2:3-5<br />
<br />
When I'm stressed out and about to go insane I will cling to Christ and have His attitude instead of my own so that I can LOVE LOUDER. I've been praying that God will use me this semester more than ever. So far God has already been working in some awesome ways! I got to share scripture and parts of the gospel in front of my entire class this morning! To God be the glory!<br />
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Love God. Love People. Live it Out.<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-27018009681832976762010-08-15T17:30:00.002-05:002015-10-09T09:26:21.651-05:00Love Is Marching to His Heartbeat I feel that I am moving to the rhythm of Your Grace<br />
Your friendship is intoxicating in this secret place<br />
After an awesome summer of going to Malawi, Africa, working cross camp, spending quality time with my sweet lil ole Mammaw before moving, and fellowshiping with awesome friends...That time is almost here again.Yep that's right, COLLEGE, Dun dun duh...<br />
I start band camp this Monday. Last year I was more nervous because I didn't know anyone, now I'm nervous because I do know everyone, haha. This past year I've tried to build relationships and invest in my fellow music major peers and band members. I absolutely love everyone in this group and want to see them know the same God that has radically changed my life! Not know of Him, but truely, intimately know Him and Follow Him. I know this is where God wants me. Though I still have no clue what I'll do with degree, I know God calls me to serve here and now. Not just leading worship in a band but also in every single music group I am in. I'm sick of playing games. I'm sick of being timid and quiet. My eyes are opened and I can love louder. May my life scream Jesus. There's no time to waste. I'm excited to kick off this year. I want to be all there and not miss it. I'm about to enter into a battle field. I want be found faithful. Here's to Sophmore year!<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-49449537025850555562010-08-10T11:34:00.003-05:002015-10-09T09:11:37.952-05:00The HeartacheSo much has been on my mind. My heart has hurt a lot and I miss the people I met in Malawi, AFRICA. I knew after going I'd most likely be burdened. I knew my heart was already broken for this place even before Going. Little did I know that when you seriously cry out "BREAK my heart for what Breaks Yours, everything I am for Your Kingdom's cause!" God would do just that.<br />
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"Love until it huts, then love more." -Momma T<br />
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Sometimes I wish I could just love until it hurts. It's when I began to Love more that I constantly think of these beautiful people. My brain explodes to comprehend how different they live from us, how much joy they have. Malawi is the "Warm Heart of Africa". Not even their title gives this place proper justice.<br />
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The majority of these adorable little kiddos had no shoes much less any clothing. One day we played soccer with the boys of Kumilindi village. They all took their shirts off and my heart was shattered in seeing the countless maknourished bellies.<br />
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Why? I can come up with many reasons why but each time I still find myself having to ask why? This makes me sooo heartbroken beyond expression. This isn't just in Malawi either. It's simply just a plane ride away.<br />
<br />
The second day in Malawi I was speaking at a house with a large amount of people.<br />
I was able to share my full testimony. A lady then turned to me and said "The same God you say delivered and healed you, can He heal me from malaria?" My heart stopped beating I'm pretty sure. Of course He can Heal. I was able to pray over her, trusting that God would heal her. I'm happy to say that this woman is still alive today! All glory be to God, Healing is in His Hands!<br />
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Another house was owned by an old and sick grandmother. Her daughter and her two children lived there as well. At first they said they had too much to do and didn't have time to sit and listen. But then we noticed the grandmother's hands we blistering from shelling a huge basket of maze (dried corn). So we asked if we did that for her would she listen. They let us sit with them a while and share bible stories along with the Gospel. Then I noticed Yulita, a19year old sitting right beside me who had malaria. She began to get really sick while I was speaking and coughed up a storm. She's my age and may not live to see 20. Too hard of something to share? This is the ugly truth of reality. These are the things that have flipped my world upside down and crushed my heart. Her brother Dishon was was very sick as well.You could see the hurt in his eyes and hear his stomach growling so loudly. I got to pray with them and encourage them with scripture. I was able to have Merify translate a short letter to them. I think about them constantly. I wish I had more time to be with them and share more of Jesus and How He Loves Us.</div>
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One day Merify and I were walking in a village.We saw a group of people and became excited to speak with them about Jesus. We continued to walk then Merify suddenly stopped and said "We need to look for the mother." Turned out it was a funeral and most funerals there have the group of people outside the house while the mother or whoever the closest loved one is in the back to mourning. So we went to the back to minister to the mother. This mother's 2 year old daughter had just passed away from aids, we found her crying and hugging her daughter who was still in her lap. The very first thing the mother said was"I am not surprised my child died from Aids. I knew she had it. I just always thought I'd be first to leave...." There are no words. I cannot get this moment off my mind. So then and there we shared Jesus Christ with her told her there was hope that can be found in Him. How He can Heal our hearts and renew us daily. The hardest thing I've ever had to say to someone that was in such a sad position...<br />
<br />
Take my Heart and make it clean<br />
Open up my eyes to the things unseen<br />
Show me how to love like You have loved me<br />
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They need prayer. They need Love. They need Jesus. They need bibles. They need discipleship. They need godly examples. They need food. They need water. They need shoes. </div>
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They have Joy.</div>
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I cannot live my life as if the other world does not exist.</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096836652101730412.post-73407405705861013222010-08-09T15:41:00.003-05:002015-10-09T07:45:15.962-05:00Serving Out of Abundance God showed me so much while I was in Africa. Not only does God call us as sons and daughters to spread the gospel among the Nations, but also our community. Even if that means we find ourselves house to house at some point...where there's a sacrifice there's a gain. There's always the typical rant of "Why are you going somewhere so far away when there are people here in America who need Jesus too..." Mmmm....I'll be honest this always gets me going. Yes, most definitely there are those in America who need to hear that Jesus loves them. I was one of them.<br />
<br />
Let's just look at it like this: In American there are millions of bibles printed, sold, and owned.<br />
Heck you could personally choose your own color, graphic design, and even be picky about which size to get. In practically every other country there are less than half the amount of bibles accessible, if there are any to be found at all. You could say that this is because America is such a blessed country, but, in Psalms 103:2 it says "Bless the Lord." Hmmm...How are we to bless the Lord if we keep everything to ourselves? I'm just sayin'. "No one is righteous, no not one."-Romans 3:10. Therefore, EVERYONE needs Jesus. What use does a bible have if it just stays on a shelf collecting dust? There is a day coming where persecution will hit America. It will come subtly and first then rapidly unfold. It's time start writing scripture on our hearts so that if we were ever to have our bible taken away, we can still follow the example Jesus set when tempted, He ministered to himself with the word from memory. Why aren't bibles given to those who'll actually open it and study it? Cause let's face it, we don't do that near enough. The translators I worked with while in Africa really challenged me to become more of a doer of the word as it is written in James 1. These relentless followers shared the gospel everywhere they went, all throughout their own country and community. With no hesitation, without excuses, without limits, and with no complaining...they shared God's Love in such beautiful ways. It reminded me how God calls me right where I am to do the same if not more. It reminded me of what I'm called to do in Monroe, LA as a college student and musician and above all, a daughter of the King. I'm to not only serve but share.<br />
<br />
Think about how many shoes we own...how much freakin food there is, not just consumed but wasted...Half of the things we own were not even made here. They were made by some of the most hard working people in the world, those who receive .09 cents a hour if even that much. Food is certainly one thing you don't see near enough of, if any, in other countries. Food, clothing, shelter, clean water, shoes...the list goes on of basic needs that are lacked. Yet, we have far more than enough to last an entire lifetime. Meanwhile, others lose their lives each day with out it. Wow.<br />
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If you think I'm crazy than that's cool, I am. People thought Jesus was crazy too. If you don't believe me read the stuff He said. Take a look at passages like Luke 9:23-27.<br />
It's hard to see the acts of in-justice while several others are still so blinded by arrogance and selfish desires. Forsake comfort and the Kingdom is yours- Matthew 5 in a nutshell.<br />
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So let's get off our lazy bums and do something for others through Christ that strengthens us.<br />
Read Genesis and meditate. It's not just some random book or simple stories we hear or teach in sunday schools, it's how we came to existence and shows us the depth of sin. Mercy and grace flows through every page. Conviction cuts like a knife when you're comfortable but just think of what God can do when walls are torn down? Ask God to tear down the walls that keep you from being completely surrenedered and sold out. He created us For Him, to serve Him, and to feed His sheep (John 21:17). There's No time to waste. The Time is NOW. We are extremely blessed to have a God that's slow to anger and patient.<br />
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This is my prayer in the Harvest when favor and providence flow<br />
I know I'm filled to be emptied again<br />
The seed I've received I will sow<br />
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May we become more comfortable with the uncomfortable.<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07470373986579728841noreply@blogger.com1