Wednesday, January 12, 2011


There are a lot of things that easily capture my heart and make it melt. Kids are definitely one of those things. I never pictured myself to fall in love with kids as much as I have. I never expected to become burdened beyond words for the orphaned, abandoned, abused, and oppressed. I just want to go back in time and prevent so much pain, suffering, and heartache from happening to such precious children. I can't help but become restless...

So many kids without homes. So many kids begging. So many kids with only one outfit. So many kids with no shoes. So many kids without parents. So many kids without anyone who has cared for them. So many kids alone. So many kids afraid. So many kids left for dead. So many kids aborted.
So many kids who've survived abortion but are now disabled for life. So many many many who need Love. So many who don't even know what Love really is. Though in the flesh I just wish I could simply punch all those who've hurt them in the face...with the attitude of Christ I know I must love the abusers as well. That's where things get hard. It comes to a point that I no longer even think nor care about what has happened to me. How I've been hurt, mistreated, and abused...but what others must endure. The funny thing is,  I've specifically prayed for God to break my heart for the afflicted and oppressed. I can never say God does not answer prayers. I can't find it in me to just sit back and watch such injustice to go on. Though I have no clue how to make a difference I'm trusting God knows. I just want to be found obedient to what He is calling me to do and how He is calling me to play a role within the work of the Kingdom.

Meet my sweet little friend. I met her exactly two weeks ago at a street kids home. She is a five year old's body basically. Her smile is contagious. Her laugh is to die for. Her eyes draw you near and her hands can paint a beautiful masterpiece.

She was most likely born disabled and considered worthless. She was told she could not be cared for. and was thrown out on the streets. Found by some amazing people who took her to the street home,  she can come and go as she pleases. Words can't describe the kind of joy I found in seeing her smile, making her laugh, and playing games with her. My heart exploded when she started hitting my drum and we began playing back and forth. We just enjoyed life together. It was as simple and blissful as ever. We immediately became besties =)

She was handicapped and had trouble walking so she'd stand watching all of us playing with the other kids and running around. The littlest things would cause her to become so happy and joyful. She was the oldest in the group and practically took care of all the others. One minute she'd be playing then as soon as one of the boys ran up and messed with her she'd set them straight, haha! It was very entertaining even though it was all in Chinese and I could barely understand a word. =)


 One of the most precious little girls I've ever met. It may seem crazy for me to have fallen in love with a kid I only spent a day with...but that little klepto stole about my heart that day. If I could have adopted her that day and was not still in college I would have in a heartbeat. A day hasn't gone by that I haven't thought about this sweet girl and prayed that God would take care of her, bless her, and show her more of what it's like to be Loved unconditionally. I see so much potential in her. Her heart is unique. Her actions are rare to find for her age. She will always hold a special place in my heart.

Then there's MenYaun. (Pretty sure that's spelled totally wrong but it's whatever.)

He was certainly a little adventurer. He decided to run away soon after meeting him. My heart broke for him. I pray God will have His hand on MenYaun's life. What joy it'd bring me to picture these kids growing up and knowing the Lord personally.

Then there's the girl who I can't seem to forget. God has placed this kid on my heart like crazy. I don't know her name. I don't know what she's been through. I don't know the ways she's been hurt. But it was so clear she has had pain from being mistreated.

There are no words...the few I have can't do how I feel any justice. I don't think I've ever felt such a burden for people/children...until I saw this girl. There is where loving the orphaned became difficult. She screamed and ran away anytime you'd come near her. It was said that she possessed. May the Most High God, Shang Di, reveal Himself to these children. My heart's desire is that they will know God and experience the Father's love. I'm currently praying for clarity in what I'm to do. My heart has been stolen by a lot of little kleptos for the past few weeks.
I am forever changed and humbled by this adventure.

Being half way around the pushing through cold weather, eating with chopsticks, playing games and songs, loving on kids who've been ignored, and sharing life/Jesus with others is what made this year the Best Christmas and New Years EVER. God is so Good.

"Stoop down and reached those who are oppressed.Share their burdens and complete Christ's law."
                                                                                                                                     -Galatians 6:2

Sunday, January 9, 2011

Brain Explosion

Since I've returned I've had all the feels.
Comfort is a dangerous thing to mess with when other's lives are suffering. Comfort is why many have never heard of Jesus Christ. Comfort is why many kids are ignored and mistreated and left alone. Comfort is sometimes why others go without food and water just a few plane flights away. Comfort is what encourages an apathetic heart and lethargic body in a recliner over no showers, wearing the same clothes over, and sleeping in a hut.

"God does not care about your own personal comfort and will sometimes allow persecution in order that His will may be done."

I cannot get this statement out of my mind. We have no idea what persecution is. But I pray someday I may be blessed enough to see what it truly is. I pray one day I can share in the suffering of Christ. I pray one day America may have persecution...So the church may finally begin to disperse and go out instead of stay in a building forever.

After seeing people worshiping idols larger than my room I began to become so broken.
Broken over the fact that they've never heard of someone who is Greater and far more worthy of praise, offerings, and sacrifice.

Many would probably see worshiping statues in other places as crazy and foolish and weird. But America has idols as well. They just don't have fancy temples, paintings, and incense burnt.

Instead, it's face paint, big screen t.v.'s, and huge stadiums.

American idols are sometimes on paper such as lottery tickets. The more money spent and possessions sacrificed, the more potential blessings and success..right? America's idols are on the billboards and news feeds. They're in the magazines and morning paper. The same God that told people in the old testament to stop bowing down to idols is the same God you pray to in the churches today. His commandment still holds true. He deserves far more than simply what makes us happy, succeed, and look good.....what makes us comfortable...

That is something I find heartbreaking. The fact that comfort has crippled the place I live in.
Despite the fact that the gospel is at the tips of our fingers, we can freely worship God as we please, there are enough bibles for everyone to own at least 2, and we have far more than anything we could ever possibly need.

I want to make Jesus known among the Nations. Though I long to be in other parts of the world at this time I know it's for me to shine a light here and now. As a 19 year old single college student who for some reason God has chosen to use in Monroe, LA. So though my heart craves for what's to come,  it is also comforted in knowing there's work to still be done in my own community. May God be glorified and recieve what He deserves. To the ends of the earth may His name be shouted on the mountain tops.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Spiritual Warfare

I never quite understood what spiritual warfare was and looked like until I went to serve in SOuthEast Asia this year. In training I heard I would soon encounter it. That you could immediately feel the tension in the air and it would be so thick you could cut it with a knife...That as soon I would get out of the plane I would know there was a war going on. A war between what is Righteous and what is wicked. A war between pureness and unclean lips. A war between the spirit and the flesh. A war between what I believe in so dearly and what the world believes. I know God is real. I'd be foolish to deny the power, provision, strength, protection, wisdom, and sovereignty of God after I've seen countless ways of how He works. I now know that satan is very real also. He's drinking lots of coffee, staying awake to ace his tests. He studies your every move and plans every way possible to try and stop God from working through you. He's not worried about those who have not accepted Christ...they're already wrapped around his fingers. Those who believe in Jesus and radically follow Him are his target. As if he suddenly forgets that he has are been defeated and the true battle was already won on the cross...

So after being informed that I would encounter spiritual warfare in the near future I began to pray more intentionally for strength to fight against it. Throughout this past month my team and I have seen God do some pretty insanely awesome things. Both in us and through us as well as other believers. We have also seen Satan at work. We've seen him stirring up our wants, tricking us into thinking that a lot of our wants were needs. He tried to cause simple frustrations to erupt into volcanoes. He was trying everything possible to have doubt, fear, and selfishness creep into our hearts. Satan knows your weakness and knows how to make you at your most vulnerable state of mind. He knows how to make you insecure and timid. That's why it is so important to renew the mind daily especially when traveling to foreign lands out of typical comfort zones.

"For God has not given us the spirit of Timidity, but of power Love,and self-discipline. So Never be afraid to tell others about the Lord." -2 Timothy 1:7

What a blessing it is that The Most High God, Shang Di, is Above All and created all.

"We are indestructable until God says so."

How many times are you doing work in the harvest and when it starts to rain, you go back inside where it's dry...? How many times do you run in the fire then peace out when it begins to get  really hot...? How many times do you go and go and go but one negative opinion causes you to completely shut down...? How many times is it dark outside and you don't even realize you have a flashlight in your backpack...? How many times do you see God working but as soon as you are uncomfortable you want to go home...?

I'm not saying these things out of condemnation, but out of love. Most of the time that's the way Satan works. Things go good, heck things go great! Then all of a sudden tension builds, the waters rise, and Satan starts the battle within a fortress of the mind that he loves to dwell in.

During the greatest of opportunities to share Christ with others...Satan is running a marathon. What a blessing it is to have discernment, to know and realize when Satan is at work. Praise God for the understanding that it's not simply ironic when you feel like quitting and giving up. Satan wants culture shock to get the best of you. It's one of the greatest mind games ever. It says in the word that even your heart can be deceitful. This means we must place our trust, hope, and complete faith in Christ because on our own we are weak.

Spiritual Warfare is real. It's everywhere and it's a constant battle. It's important to seek God's guidance in fighting against fleshly desires. REST is essential and the armor has to be put on daily as well as time spent in the war room/secret place.

Don't buy into the lies. Don't allow yourself to stop serving the Lord. Don't back out when you feel led and called to Go. Never turn down an opportunity to share the gospel with others.